Worrier.

I used to have a boss who would say.. "If you are worrying you aren't trusting, and if you are trusting you aren't worrying". He told me this often because I have always identified myself as a worrier. I use it as an excuse to not totally trust God, I use it as an excuse to live always concerned about something totally out of my control. And honestly, it's a tough way to live.

Something happened months ago in my life. Something that hurt my feelings and I guess my pride too. I have been pretty regularly concerned about it for most of this year. I have talked to people closest to me about it until they are tired of hearing about it. I have let myself be consumed by something that most people have forgotten. Does that make any sense? I know it doesn't.

Anyway, in the last couple of weeks realizing that I had burned out all the people I consider my "listening ears" on the subject, I started really talking to God about it. When worry would creep up, I would stop my thoughts and remind myself to allow God to work it out. And honestly, I have been at such peace for days about it. Why didn't I go to God first? Why did I talk to everyone else about it before I talked to God? I have no idea. And it makes no sense. But I have learned my lesson.

If you are worrying you aren't trusting, and if you are trusting you aren't worrying.