Monday, August 10, 2015
Worrier.
I used to have a boss who would say.. "If you are worrying you aren't trusting, and if you are trusting you aren't worrying". He told me this often because I have always identified myself as a worrier. I use it as an excuse to not totally trust God, I use it as an excuse to live always concerned about something totally out of my control. And honestly, it's a tough way to live.
Something happened months ago in my life. Something that hurt my feelings and I guess my pride too. I have been pretty regularly concerned about it for most of this year. I have talked to people closest to me about it until they are tired of hearing about it. I have let myself be consumed by something that most people have forgotten. Does that make any sense? I know it doesn't.
Anyway, in the last couple of weeks realizing that I had burned out all the people I consider my "listening ears" on the subject, I started really talking to God about it. When worry would creep up, I would stop my thoughts and remind myself to allow God to work it out. And honestly, I have been at such peace for days about it. Why didn't I go to God first? Why did I talk to everyone else about it before I talked to God? I have no idea. And it makes no sense. But I have learned my lesson.
If you are worrying you aren't trusting, and if you are trusting you aren't worrying.
Sunday, August 2, 2015
The Tragedy of Foster Care
I teach classes intended to prepare individuals to be foster parents. It is something that you definitely learn by doing.. but I do what I can to open their eyes and prepare their hearts. We talk about everything they should strive to be as foster parents. We talk about different situations they might encounter. We talk about who to call and how to handle the unexpected situations you can find yourself in while on the foster care journey. It is a ten week class, and it is always a precious time for me to learn the hearts of people who have a true desire to serve God by serving others. I haven't experienced a thousand difficult days by any means, but a lot of the difficult days I have endured were as a foster mother.
It is a difficult calling to love someone who you are almost positive will leave you with limited notice, and an uncertain future. It is something that God did through me, because it was a time in my life (almost six years!) that I could not have done on my own. It was a time I made a lot of selfish mistakes, and learned a lot of hard lessons. It was a time that I thank God for. It is a time that molded me.
I write all of that to say.. foster care is terrible. It is a mother losing her child and a father hitting rock bottom. It is a child in a constant state of missing people they truly love. Foster care is a tragedy. Truly, a tragedy.
And lately I've seen and heard a lot of people anticipating the arrival of foster children ( I keep in regular contact with many of the couples I teach in foster parent training). And I understand their eagerness, they have endured the ten week class, they have gone through detailed home inspections, their backgrounds have been checked, their pets have been proven vaccinated, they've dealt with the doubts of loved ones. They've followed their hearts. And now they are ready to make a difference. I have been there. I know how they feel. They are waiting on those children.. but I wish they wouldn't.
I wish they would realize that a child coming into their home is a terrible loss. A life changing time for a family. The worst day in the life of the child they eagerly anticipate. I wish I could tell them to be thankful for everyday their foster care agency doesn't have to call them, because unfortunately there will be too many days that they do.
If it is on your heart, I always encourage you to become a foster parent. The best thing that can happen on that child's worst day is they be welcomed into a stable, loving home. I thank God regularly for the times I have seen scared children immediately loved by strangers. I praise God for compassionate hearts.
It is a difficult calling to love someone who you are almost positive will leave you with limited notice, and an uncertain future. It is something that God did through me, because it was a time in my life (almost six years!) that I could not have done on my own. It was a time I made a lot of selfish mistakes, and learned a lot of hard lessons. It was a time that I thank God for. It is a time that molded me.
I write all of that to say.. foster care is terrible. It is a mother losing her child and a father hitting rock bottom. It is a child in a constant state of missing people they truly love. Foster care is a tragedy. Truly, a tragedy.
And lately I've seen and heard a lot of people anticipating the arrival of foster children ( I keep in regular contact with many of the couples I teach in foster parent training). And I understand their eagerness, they have endured the ten week class, they have gone through detailed home inspections, their backgrounds have been checked, their pets have been proven vaccinated, they've dealt with the doubts of loved ones. They've followed their hearts. And now they are ready to make a difference. I have been there. I know how they feel. They are waiting on those children.. but I wish they wouldn't.
I wish they would realize that a child coming into their home is a terrible loss. A life changing time for a family. The worst day in the life of the child they eagerly anticipate. I wish I could tell them to be thankful for everyday their foster care agency doesn't have to call them, because unfortunately there will be too many days that they do.
If it is on your heart, I always encourage you to become a foster parent. The best thing that can happen on that child's worst day is they be welcomed into a stable, loving home. I thank God regularly for the times I have seen scared children immediately loved by strangers. I praise God for compassionate hearts.
