Growing up my parents spent alot of time together. And we did most everything as a family. I remember many car trips singing rounds of.. row, row, row your boat.. and they are sweet memories that I truly cherish. And I guess they were my example.
Tim and I spend alot of time together. On the weekends, if you see one of us you will probably see the other. Sometimes people have smart comments, but I love that we love to be together! Weeks are rushed and weekends are precious to me. It is when I am able to take time to really appreciate us as husband and wife, and a family. I love the fact that he will get up and go to yard sales with me, and I make sure I attend my fair share of ballgames. I just really love being with him. There are days like in all marriages that we have to take a step back, but I can without reservation tell you that Tim is my very best friend. God knew I needed not just a husband, but a friend. And that is truly what He gave me.
I do love friend time. I deeply value girls dinners, and time with mom. My world would be much less colorful without my sweet girlfriends! And I love that he has Friday night football with his friends. I know that those Friday nights mean alot to him. And his hunting (which I just cannot enjoy!!).
But I also really love that we aren't just passing each other in the hallway. I love that we aren't just recounting big events to each other, but sharing them. I love being married. And I love Tim :)
Friday, April 27, 2012
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Color..blind?
I read a blog today. It is written by a mama that I do not know. She had to write it because her little four year old girl, who she adopted, was uninvited from a family member's birthday celebration. I wanted to cry. She was uninvited, because she is HIV positive. A life sentence that she will serve from no fault of her own. My first thought was, what brave people to adopt her. She could have very easily spent her life in an orphanage because no one was willing to be educated on her disease. Her new parents decided to share her condition in order to help educate others, and I guess now are feeling the negative reactions from their news.
And it hurt me. It hurt me for the mama of the beautiful little girl. It her me that her baby will grow up treated differently.
I guess part of the reason it hurt me is because it made me think of my own family. I have prayed many prayers that God would soften the hearts of those who know and love us and allow them to totally accept us as a family. Different colors and all. And for the most part, that is exactly what has happened. But I know there will come a day that someone (I envision a mean little kid on the playground) will point out to Andrew that he is a different color than his mom. And I hope at that the moment, the years of deep down love that he has felt from us totally over takes him and he is able to brush it off. But I worry that it will hurt him. And that he will feel different. And that brings tears to my eyes.
I know so many families that have recently adopted children of different races. The Godwins and The Phillips both adopted beautiful brown little girls about the time we adopted Andrew. And I thank God that more and more people are expanding the much too narrow definition of family. Heaven will be as colorful as a rainbow, so I am glad that earthly families are reflecting this as well.
Everyday I am reminded that family is not a group of people bound by blood. It is a group of people bound by love. My family far exceeds those who simply share my bloodline. It is filled with sweet friends, in laws, church family, and because of the beauty of adoption it includes two precious cousins that have held my heart since the first night I met them. And my son. My sweet boy who I would not have the priviledge of raising if it were not for family meaning so much more than just being born into a group.
I want you to join me in an effort to acknowledge families beautiful differences. We can't pretend we are all pasty white! Differences are something I think should be celebrated! And encourage. I know encouragement is something I long for somedays. And I hope that you will encourage my son and daughter as they grow. I know that Cates too will probably at some point have to endure that playground bully, and it will be just fine with me if she knocks them out :)
Let's all be more tolerant of difference whether opinions or physical traits. Let's all love each other more. And let's all let each other know it every chance we get!
I also want to ask your continued prayers for my sweet college friend Lena and her baby boy James. He is undergoing very difficult surgery. Tim and I have prayed and begged. And I know, I really do know, that God will provide for this precious family. His ways are so much more than we can begin to understand. Pray, pray, pray.
And it hurt me. It hurt me for the mama of the beautiful little girl. It her me that her baby will grow up treated differently.
I guess part of the reason it hurt me is because it made me think of my own family. I have prayed many prayers that God would soften the hearts of those who know and love us and allow them to totally accept us as a family. Different colors and all. And for the most part, that is exactly what has happened. But I know there will come a day that someone (I envision a mean little kid on the playground) will point out to Andrew that he is a different color than his mom. And I hope at that the moment, the years of deep down love that he has felt from us totally over takes him and he is able to brush it off. But I worry that it will hurt him. And that he will feel different. And that brings tears to my eyes.
I know so many families that have recently adopted children of different races. The Godwins and The Phillips both adopted beautiful brown little girls about the time we adopted Andrew. And I thank God that more and more people are expanding the much too narrow definition of family. Heaven will be as colorful as a rainbow, so I am glad that earthly families are reflecting this as well.
Everyday I am reminded that family is not a group of people bound by blood. It is a group of people bound by love. My family far exceeds those who simply share my bloodline. It is filled with sweet friends, in laws, church family, and because of the beauty of adoption it includes two precious cousins that have held my heart since the first night I met them. And my son. My sweet boy who I would not have the priviledge of raising if it were not for family meaning so much more than just being born into a group.
I want you to join me in an effort to acknowledge families beautiful differences. We can't pretend we are all pasty white! Differences are something I think should be celebrated! And encourage. I know encouragement is something I long for somedays. And I hope that you will encourage my son and daughter as they grow. I know that Cates too will probably at some point have to endure that playground bully, and it will be just fine with me if she knocks them out :)
Let's all be more tolerant of difference whether opinions or physical traits. Let's all love each other more. And let's all let each other know it every chance we get!
I also want to ask your continued prayers for my sweet college friend Lena and her baby boy James. He is undergoing very difficult surgery. Tim and I have prayed and begged. And I know, I really do know, that God will provide for this precious family. His ways are so much more than we can begin to understand. Pray, pray, pray.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
My Mama
I want to share with you some things that my mama taught me. Things that no doubt have helped make me who I am today. And I hope my children will learn from me as well.
Don't Dwell, Solve.
Growing up, we didn't spend alot of time complaining about problems, we were taught to fix them. There wasn't room for pouting, and feeling like a victim.. if there was a problem.. you should pray about it.. and then to the best of your ability find a solution. I see myself as an adult doing this all the time.. I see myself being presented with a problem at home or work.. and instead of feeling sorry for myself..I immediately start thinking of the best way to solve the issue at hand. When you let problems stack, when you leave things unresolved, that can leave alot of room for baggage and bridges burned. My mama made me a solver.
Do good, regardless.
It isn't always easy to help others. Alot of times money is low, extra time is rare, and I want someone helping me instead of being helpful. My mom has lived a life of giving. And most of the time, she does it without anyone knowing. She buys gifts for people in need at Christmas, she cooks for whoever is sick (or at least purchases a meal :) ), she is always thinking of someone else.
Work Hard. She is a worker. And not only is she a hard worker, she almost always finds success. People respect her business abilities. I know I do. I have witnessed her professionalism, and her desire to achieve. Ever since I was a little girl I have admired her work ethic. She has inspired in me the desire to do my very best everyday. And I have seen the fruits of my labor over and over again.
Family Matters.
Mama always put us and dad first. Still does. And her grandchildren of course! She didn't miss ballgames or big days. We were allowed to be free thinkers, and she listened to us. Alot of days, I don't feel listened to. But I do always feel like my mama hears me. She taught us to look out for one another. And value each other. Even today, my brother and I don't always get along. We are just different people. But if he ever needed me for one second my world would stop to see about him, and I know he would do the same for me.
Forgive.
Now that does not mean that you will always hear her apologize. Because she doesn't! It doesn't mean that she always gives in, or bows down. But she does forgive. Sometimes it will be a quiet forgiveness that just moves on, sometimes it will be verbalized. But with me, once she has forgiven me, we move on. She doesn't throw it in my face a week, or month, or year later. She doesn't harp. She forgives the right way. She wipes your slate clean and provides you with a new opportunity. I need to continue to learn from her. I need to work on giving new chances, and leaving the past behind. She has taught me so many things. She is a dear friend to me. And one of the people I am most proud to know. She is a fantastic mom, and a fabulous grandmom too. So thankful for her :) And don't worry dad.. your blog will be next! :)
Don't Dwell, Solve.
Growing up, we didn't spend alot of time complaining about problems, we were taught to fix them. There wasn't room for pouting, and feeling like a victim.. if there was a problem.. you should pray about it.. and then to the best of your ability find a solution. I see myself as an adult doing this all the time.. I see myself being presented with a problem at home or work.. and instead of feeling sorry for myself..I immediately start thinking of the best way to solve the issue at hand. When you let problems stack, when you leave things unresolved, that can leave alot of room for baggage and bridges burned. My mama made me a solver.
Do good, regardless.
It isn't always easy to help others. Alot of times money is low, extra time is rare, and I want someone helping me instead of being helpful. My mom has lived a life of giving. And most of the time, she does it without anyone knowing. She buys gifts for people in need at Christmas, she cooks for whoever is sick (or at least purchases a meal :) ), she is always thinking of someone else.
Work Hard. She is a worker. And not only is she a hard worker, she almost always finds success. People respect her business abilities. I know I do. I have witnessed her professionalism, and her desire to achieve. Ever since I was a little girl I have admired her work ethic. She has inspired in me the desire to do my very best everyday. And I have seen the fruits of my labor over and over again.
Family Matters.
Mama always put us and dad first. Still does. And her grandchildren of course! She didn't miss ballgames or big days. We were allowed to be free thinkers, and she listened to us. Alot of days, I don't feel listened to. But I do always feel like my mama hears me. She taught us to look out for one another. And value each other. Even today, my brother and I don't always get along. We are just different people. But if he ever needed me for one second my world would stop to see about him, and I know he would do the same for me.
Forgive.
Now that does not mean that you will always hear her apologize. Because she doesn't! It doesn't mean that she always gives in, or bows down. But she does forgive. Sometimes it will be a quiet forgiveness that just moves on, sometimes it will be verbalized. But with me, once she has forgiven me, we move on. She doesn't throw it in my face a week, or month, or year later. She doesn't harp. She forgives the right way. She wipes your slate clean and provides you with a new opportunity. I need to continue to learn from her. I need to work on giving new chances, and leaving the past behind. She has taught me so many things. She is a dear friend to me. And one of the people I am most proud to know. She is a fantastic mom, and a fabulous grandmom too. So thankful for her :) And don't worry dad.. your blog will be next! :)
Teenagers.
You know I try not to be shy about sharing things I learn the hard way. I guess that it keeps my pride in check, and maybe it can help check yours too! (if needed, of course) I have raised a teenager for almost two and half years now. Not two and a half easy years, but I am able to say that they have been educational and at times inspiring. In this time I have been aggrevated at times with other teen parents. I thought.. wow, they straight let them run wild, or why are they giving up on them this late in the game?! I would see them wearing things that I know probably wasn't best, I would hear them say things that I knew they should know better than to say, their facebooks would make me blush, and through all of this I have thought... WHERE IS YOUR MAMA???????
Now I know the answer to what's happening with their parents. They are tired. And by tired I mean, even if they wanted to say stop, don't do it, they literally have lost the energy to say it. I know this because after 2.5 years I am tired. I am tired of correcting. I am tired of redirecting. I am tired.
Now, does that mean we should give up? No. Does that justify lowering our standard to prevent more draining arguments? No.
But what it does mean is.. we need to give each other a break. And, if you are close enough to a teenager to help them stay on track.. please do so! Sometimes one person can only say something so many times before it is totally tuned out. And maybe these tired mamas are still trying, and they are just being ignored. All I know is.. it takes a team. If you know my teenager and have an opportunity to encourage or reprimand her. Please do so. I need your help. So do other mamas. Let's all help each other.. college is just around the corner! (kidding, well mostly kidding.)
Now I know the answer to what's happening with their parents. They are tired. And by tired I mean, even if they wanted to say stop, don't do it, they literally have lost the energy to say it. I know this because after 2.5 years I am tired. I am tired of correcting. I am tired of redirecting. I am tired.
Now, does that mean we should give up? No. Does that justify lowering our standard to prevent more draining arguments? No.
But what it does mean is.. we need to give each other a break. And, if you are close enough to a teenager to help them stay on track.. please do so! Sometimes one person can only say something so many times before it is totally tuned out. And maybe these tired mamas are still trying, and they are just being ignored. All I know is.. it takes a team. If you know my teenager and have an opportunity to encourage or reprimand her. Please do so. I need your help. So do other mamas. Let's all help each other.. college is just around the corner! (kidding, well mostly kidding.)
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Catching Up! :)
Cates goes to her first day of daycare tomorrow. And it makes me sad. Pray for her, and for her mama. I know daycare is super positive for her development and social skills. But I have loved her riding with me everyday, and I have rushed after work to pick her up. Tim will take her now.. but its only about 40 days til summer.. and I can handle that :) Also, she will be with Andrew, and I look forward to their bond being so close in age. So that is a positive.
Tim turned 29 yesterday! It was alot of fun. We had breakfast, and then we went to the Zoo. We looked at animals.. and rode the train.. and it was alot of fun :) His last year in the 20's. I know it will be fantastic!
I won a field trip grant so we will be taking our sweet first graders on a field trip Thursday and then we are off work on Friday! I know that this week will be alot of fun and I look forward to Easter weekend :) Friday night Tiffany is going to a prom in Montgomery, and Saturday I hope it is pretty enough to be by the pool, Sunday the Easter Bunny will hopefully hop on in.
We continue to be humbled by and thankful for our many blessings. God is good.
Tim turned 29 yesterday! It was alot of fun. We had breakfast, and then we went to the Zoo. We looked at animals.. and rode the train.. and it was alot of fun :) His last year in the 20's. I know it will be fantastic!
I won a field trip grant so we will be taking our sweet first graders on a field trip Thursday and then we are off work on Friday! I know that this week will be alot of fun and I look forward to Easter weekend :) Friday night Tiffany is going to a prom in Montgomery, and Saturday I hope it is pretty enough to be by the pool, Sunday the Easter Bunny will hopefully hop on in.
We continue to be humbled by and thankful for our many blessings. God is good.
