How can you not love this time of year? I truly see the good it brings out in people. My Aunt Tina told me last week that I had a lightness about me. I really think it is the season. The carols and the lights and the smiles and the pretty bows on the gifts.
It is just a wonderful time of year. This year we will have six children for Christmas! At first, I wanted to reserve it for our babies. But why not make six children's Christmas special if you have that opportunity?!
So we are wrapping and shopping alot lately! I hope to finish as much as I can this weekend. Our five year anniversary is in a couple of weeks and I want to spend it just thinking about the blessed five years I have had with the man of my dreams :) Cheesy, but true.
I hope to write again before.. but in case I do not. I wish you all a very Merry Christmas season!
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Resilience.
Resilience.
We have two new sweet foster children. They are precious girls. Truly probably two of the easiest human beings I have ever encountered. They are just well adjusted, resilient people.
Yesterday as we left a visit with their parents the smallest girl cried. As soon as we were out of the parking lot her tears stopped and she said, “Well, only seven more days til we see mommy and daddy”. Resilience. The ability to spring back. As an adult a lot of the things I see in the lives of sweet foster children would cripple me. Literally. I would think the world had ended. But children have a beautiful way of bouncing back. Finding the bright spots. And moving forward.
Our lives are changing a lot in the next few weeks. Tim is taking a new job. A job he described to me as his dream job. Change scares me. Everyone knows that. I walk through life pretty much scared of everything. But I know God’s plan out weigh ours and I know that HE will see Tim through. Pray for us in this transition. The job description is totally different than we are accustomed to and we will all need to adjust. And as wonderful as the people he has been working with are and have been to him, I have a really good feeling about his new boss and coworkers. Just please, please pray.
Andrew and Cates continue to keep us running! If you have never had two children that close in age.. wow! Some days I sit down for the first time at 8:00 p.m. and just have to laugh. Our days are full. And I wouldn’t trade them for anything. I just try to remember that time will fly by and soon I will be dealing with smartmouth teenagers
We have two new sweet foster children. They are precious girls. Truly probably two of the easiest human beings I have ever encountered. They are just well adjusted, resilient people.
Yesterday as we left a visit with their parents the smallest girl cried. As soon as we were out of the parking lot her tears stopped and she said, “Well, only seven more days til we see mommy and daddy”. Resilience. The ability to spring back. As an adult a lot of the things I see in the lives of sweet foster children would cripple me. Literally. I would think the world had ended. But children have a beautiful way of bouncing back. Finding the bright spots. And moving forward.
Our lives are changing a lot in the next few weeks. Tim is taking a new job. A job he described to me as his dream job. Change scares me. Everyone knows that. I walk through life pretty much scared of everything. But I know God’s plan out weigh ours and I know that HE will see Tim through. Pray for us in this transition. The job description is totally different than we are accustomed to and we will all need to adjust. And as wonderful as the people he has been working with are and have been to him, I have a really good feeling about his new boss and coworkers. Just please, please pray.
Andrew and Cates continue to keep us running! If you have never had two children that close in age.. wow! Some days I sit down for the first time at 8:00 p.m. and just have to laugh. Our days are full. And I wouldn’t trade them for anything. I just try to remember that time will fly by and soon I will be dealing with smartmouth teenagers
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
My sweet girl is one!
Cates is one. Can you believe that? I really cant. More than a year ago now we were admitted into the hospital and started our more than a week stay there.. leaving with our precious baby girl.
Her first birthday party was filled with our closest family and dearest friends. It was a wonderful time and I thank God for giving us such a wonderful support system.
In honor of my baby’s first birthday I want to share ten of my most special moments with her! No particular order.. because who can pick a number one?!
1. When I first saw her. Getting to the seeing her part was slightly traumatic (what birth story isn’t?!), but when I saw her it all went away. She was healthy and perfect and a gift from God that I could actually hold in my hands. Our first days together were precious and engraved on my heart forever.
2. Our Santa picture. If you didn’t see it, I wish you could. Andrew was screaming and crying at the top of his lungs.. and Cates was sleeping peacefully. Even now, it is similar to how they work. He is wound up and she is laid back. He is everywhere and she is right beside me. I love how different they are and how much it works. And I really love their first Santa picture
3. When I first heard mama. Is that when your life is complete?! It was beautiful and long waited for. Andrew held out on us awhile! So when she said it early on I really enjoyed it!
4. The beach. She is a truly easy baby. When we went on our family vacation to the beach, she had a bad ear infection.. (thank goodness for the tubes weve gotten since!) but she was still a joy to be around. Out section trip was even better. She crawled all over the sand.. ate some.. and just say in it and played for so long. Im glad she loves the beach!
5. Easter. I loved her dress, and the bunny was good to her! She had beautiful pictures made. And it was a special time.
6. Mother’s Day. Wow. It was my first Mother’s Day with my own children! Tim made it so so special and I will always remember it. I look forward to many more with this sweet girl!
7. Tim’s birthday. We went to the zoo and she really loved seeing all the animals. She was very animated and she wore the cutest monkey outfit ;) Tim loved having us all there and I think it is a day he will always really value.
8. Old Mexico! This summer Cates and I looked for any reason to go to OM for lunch! We had friend lunches, daddy lunches, Bop lunches.. you name it. She loves some Mexican and now that school has started anytime we walk in she is pumped.
9. Her first bath in the real tub. Talk about pure joy. Just squealing and laughing and splashing. I love those times where she just is really, really happy.
10. Her first birthday party! It went exactly how I wanted it to. The food was good, the décor was cute, and the people there loved her and our family! Hard to beat
Those are just ten of the hundreds of memories that I value so much. Please pray that her next 100 years are as wonderful her first!
Her first birthday party was filled with our closest family and dearest friends. It was a wonderful time and I thank God for giving us such a wonderful support system.
In honor of my baby’s first birthday I want to share ten of my most special moments with her! No particular order.. because who can pick a number one?!
1. When I first saw her. Getting to the seeing her part was slightly traumatic (what birth story isn’t?!), but when I saw her it all went away. She was healthy and perfect and a gift from God that I could actually hold in my hands. Our first days together were precious and engraved on my heart forever.
2. Our Santa picture. If you didn’t see it, I wish you could. Andrew was screaming and crying at the top of his lungs.. and Cates was sleeping peacefully. Even now, it is similar to how they work. He is wound up and she is laid back. He is everywhere and she is right beside me. I love how different they are and how much it works. And I really love their first Santa picture
3. When I first heard mama. Is that when your life is complete?! It was beautiful and long waited for. Andrew held out on us awhile! So when she said it early on I really enjoyed it!
4. The beach. She is a truly easy baby. When we went on our family vacation to the beach, she had a bad ear infection.. (thank goodness for the tubes weve gotten since!) but she was still a joy to be around. Out section trip was even better. She crawled all over the sand.. ate some.. and just say in it and played for so long. Im glad she loves the beach!
5. Easter. I loved her dress, and the bunny was good to her! She had beautiful pictures made. And it was a special time.
6. Mother’s Day. Wow. It was my first Mother’s Day with my own children! Tim made it so so special and I will always remember it. I look forward to many more with this sweet girl!
7. Tim’s birthday. We went to the zoo and she really loved seeing all the animals. She was very animated and she wore the cutest monkey outfit ;) Tim loved having us all there and I think it is a day he will always really value.
8. Old Mexico! This summer Cates and I looked for any reason to go to OM for lunch! We had friend lunches, daddy lunches, Bop lunches.. you name it. She loves some Mexican and now that school has started anytime we walk in she is pumped.
9. Her first bath in the real tub. Talk about pure joy. Just squealing and laughing and splashing. I love those times where she just is really, really happy.
10. Her first birthday party! It went exactly how I wanted it to. The food was good, the décor was cute, and the people there loved her and our family! Hard to beat
Those are just ten of the hundreds of memories that I value so much. Please pray that her next 100 years are as wonderful her first!
Tuesday, September 11, 2012
Our birthdays should really recognize our mamas!
To My Mom:
I have always known you were a wonderful mother. This year becoming a mother to my very own children has taught me a few things about how great of a mom you were growing up.. and are today.
1. You were a really good mom even when you were really tired.
Sometimes I can literally feel myself dragging out of bed. Barely getting to the room across the hall to answer the sweet calls I hear for “mama, mama”. I know that there were so many days that you were kind and funny and loving when you were really, really tired. And this birthday of mine more than ever before I recognize you for your energy, and your constant love regardless of your bad day, the late hour, or your own need for rest.
2. You really did go without for ME.
I am not lacking anything I need. I am not even lacking a lot of things that I want. But I am much more likely to buy Cates and Andrew a new outfit than myself. I probably don’t see as many movies as I’d like to.. and a lot of that has to do with the cost of daycare, diapers, formula.. etc. And it opens my eyes to the twelve years of private school you paid for Bert and I. It opens my eyes to all the new clothes we had, and special Christmas gifts. And how to make all those things happen, you probably fairly regularly went without. Thank you for that. Thank you more than I know how to say.
3. You let me move on.
You didn’t hold against me every mistake. You didn’t constantly bring up to me poor decisions. You let me learn and move on. And because of that I learned that accidents happen. Things are just that, things. If they are broken they can be replaced. I learned that sometimes we mess up. And that doesn’t make us bad people, that makes us real people. And I want to do the same for my children. Because of you Andrew will probably never be in trouble for staining up his Polo (let’s be real, it was probably only 6 dollars at a consignment sale!), Cates will never be fussed at for accidently breaking a vase or spilling a drink. Accidents happen. And when they grow up and they do something that they know is wrong, they will be punished, they will learn from it. And we will move on. Thank you for teaching me the difference in big things and little things in life, and in parenting.
4. Parenting doesn’t end…
I think now more than ever I need you and dad. I need you to make me laugh and keep me sane. I need you to encourage me and pull me through. I need you to love my children so they can know the wonderful people who shaped their mother. I am glad to know that what sometimes feels like long days and short nights and a lot of “No, No ANDREW!” turns into beautiful friendships. I am thankful that you have provided me the example of going from mother to friend as an adult. I look forward to the friendship I know Andrew, Cates and I will have as adults.
5. You taught me the beauty of No.
Because of you, I am not spoiled. I do not think the world owes me a thing. I know that it is my job to work hard, and to earn, and to be respectful. I know these things because you told me no. You told me no when I wanted something that I didn’t need and couldn’t afford, you told me no when I wanted to do something that I had been told I could not do, you told me no when you didn’t believe in what I was asking. I am thankful for that. I am thankful that I did not grow up to feel entitled. I am thankful that I learned to work hard for things I wanted. I am thankful that you were strong enough to tell me no. And I pray I can do the same for my children.
6. You went through some pain for me!!
And yes, I mean child birth. Girl, there is no way anyone can prepare you for giving birth! That is the real deal. I know you were tired while you carried me. I know for sure that your feet and back hurt for about nine good months. I know that when the day came (28 years ago!) for me to enter the world, you went through so much physically.. for me. Thank you mama. You never remind me of how hard it was or how bad you felt physically to bring me into the world.. but I do plan to remind Cates regularly of all I went thru! Guess you are kinder than me
7. Love lasts forever.
I know that there is nothing I could say or do to keep you from loving me. I know there is not a place I could move that could distance our relationship. I know that we will argue, and we will disagree, and you will love me just the same. Thank you for never making me wonder if a mistake would lead to the end of your love, thank you for the confidence you have given me in our relationship. I pray that Cates and Andrew will know that my love for them is without end. I hope they will feel the admiration for me that I feel for you.
I hope that I can be the kind of mama you have been for me, for them.
I love you forever.
Thank you for all you did for me 28 years ago.. and all you have done for me since.
To my sweet daddy..
I wrote this to mama, because this year of my life I became a mama. But I hope you know that you hold a place in my heart that no one else can touch. You are my dear friend, and my greatest encourager. I thank God for you every single day. I am so thankful that you are Bop to Andrew and Cates and that they already seem realize that you will be one of their life's biggest fans. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I love you daddy.
I have always known you were a wonderful mother. This year becoming a mother to my very own children has taught me a few things about how great of a mom you were growing up.. and are today.
1. You were a really good mom even when you were really tired.
Sometimes I can literally feel myself dragging out of bed. Barely getting to the room across the hall to answer the sweet calls I hear for “mama, mama”. I know that there were so many days that you were kind and funny and loving when you were really, really tired. And this birthday of mine more than ever before I recognize you for your energy, and your constant love regardless of your bad day, the late hour, or your own need for rest.
2. You really did go without for ME.
I am not lacking anything I need. I am not even lacking a lot of things that I want. But I am much more likely to buy Cates and Andrew a new outfit than myself. I probably don’t see as many movies as I’d like to.. and a lot of that has to do with the cost of daycare, diapers, formula.. etc. And it opens my eyes to the twelve years of private school you paid for Bert and I. It opens my eyes to all the new clothes we had, and special Christmas gifts. And how to make all those things happen, you probably fairly regularly went without. Thank you for that. Thank you more than I know how to say.
3. You let me move on.
You didn’t hold against me every mistake. You didn’t constantly bring up to me poor decisions. You let me learn and move on. And because of that I learned that accidents happen. Things are just that, things. If they are broken they can be replaced. I learned that sometimes we mess up. And that doesn’t make us bad people, that makes us real people. And I want to do the same for my children. Because of you Andrew will probably never be in trouble for staining up his Polo (let’s be real, it was probably only 6 dollars at a consignment sale!), Cates will never be fussed at for accidently breaking a vase or spilling a drink. Accidents happen. And when they grow up and they do something that they know is wrong, they will be punished, they will learn from it. And we will move on. Thank you for teaching me the difference in big things and little things in life, and in parenting.
4. Parenting doesn’t end…
I think now more than ever I need you and dad. I need you to make me laugh and keep me sane. I need you to encourage me and pull me through. I need you to love my children so they can know the wonderful people who shaped their mother. I am glad to know that what sometimes feels like long days and short nights and a lot of “No, No ANDREW!” turns into beautiful friendships. I am thankful that you have provided me the example of going from mother to friend as an adult. I look forward to the friendship I know Andrew, Cates and I will have as adults.
5. You taught me the beauty of No.
Because of you, I am not spoiled. I do not think the world owes me a thing. I know that it is my job to work hard, and to earn, and to be respectful. I know these things because you told me no. You told me no when I wanted something that I didn’t need and couldn’t afford, you told me no when I wanted to do something that I had been told I could not do, you told me no when you didn’t believe in what I was asking. I am thankful for that. I am thankful that I did not grow up to feel entitled. I am thankful that I learned to work hard for things I wanted. I am thankful that you were strong enough to tell me no. And I pray I can do the same for my children.
6. You went through some pain for me!!
And yes, I mean child birth. Girl, there is no way anyone can prepare you for giving birth! That is the real deal. I know you were tired while you carried me. I know for sure that your feet and back hurt for about nine good months. I know that when the day came (28 years ago!) for me to enter the world, you went through so much physically.. for me. Thank you mama. You never remind me of how hard it was or how bad you felt physically to bring me into the world.. but I do plan to remind Cates regularly of all I went thru! Guess you are kinder than me
7. Love lasts forever.
I know that there is nothing I could say or do to keep you from loving me. I know there is not a place I could move that could distance our relationship. I know that we will argue, and we will disagree, and you will love me just the same. Thank you for never making me wonder if a mistake would lead to the end of your love, thank you for the confidence you have given me in our relationship. I pray that Cates and Andrew will know that my love for them is without end. I hope they will feel the admiration for me that I feel for you.
I hope that I can be the kind of mama you have been for me, for them.
I love you forever.
Thank you for all you did for me 28 years ago.. and all you have done for me since.
To my sweet daddy..
I wrote this to mama, because this year of my life I became a mama. But I hope you know that you hold a place in my heart that no one else can touch. You are my dear friend, and my greatest encourager. I thank God for you every single day. I am so thankful that you are Bop to Andrew and Cates and that they already seem realize that you will be one of their life's biggest fans. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I love you daddy.
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Peace.
I found this on my computer today. I typed it on October 19th. The day before we went to court to see if Andrew was eligible for adoption. I am not sure why I never posted it. I wanted to make sure I put it in my blog today so that when the day comes I look back and wonder what I was thinking with so much burden on my heart.. 8 months pregnant and ending a long 18 month wait to change my son's last name. I am thankful to see that I felt such peace. There certainly is a peace that passes understanding.
Tomorrow is the day. Long waited for. Long prayed for. I am more confident today than I ever have been that God has heard us. He heard my pleas, and yours. And I am confident that tomorrow, He will give us the answer we have begged for. For the first time I remember, I have a peace that I do not understand. I know that on a normal day, I would not feel the calm that I feel today with something so heavy weighing. This too is an answer to prayer.
I can see God perfectly in each step of the last fifteen months. I see Him in DHR’s choice to call us to care for our sweet man, I see Him in the natural bond that formed immediately and permanently between Tim and I and our little boy, I see him in things that have worked out that I probably should not give details about for now. I see him in the happy, healthy little boy that I love.
The sermon Sunday hit home for me. The two previous weeks I had listened to sermons on or touching on adoption and I cried through both of them. But this Sunday, the sermon was about dealing with uncertainty and hard times. And the major points are that we should pray, ask others to pray, pray specifically, and then celebrate in anticipation of victory. I have never had the confidence before to celebrate simply because I ANTICIPATED victory. But so many times aren’t we encouraged to do that? Knock and it will be opened. Ask and you will receive. And doesn’t Mark 11:24 say it all? “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.”
I am choosing to believe the Maker and Creator, I am choosing to be comforted in ALL that he has promised me. Not because I am for one second worthy of one good thing, but because God has chosen to love me and Andrew.
Tomorrow is the day. Long waited for. Long prayed for. I am more confident today than I ever have been that God has heard us. He heard my pleas, and yours. And I am confident that tomorrow, He will give us the answer we have begged for. For the first time I remember, I have a peace that I do not understand. I know that on a normal day, I would not feel the calm that I feel today with something so heavy weighing. This too is an answer to prayer.
I can see God perfectly in each step of the last fifteen months. I see Him in DHR’s choice to call us to care for our sweet man, I see Him in the natural bond that formed immediately and permanently between Tim and I and our little boy, I see him in things that have worked out that I probably should not give details about for now. I see him in the happy, healthy little boy that I love.
The sermon Sunday hit home for me. The two previous weeks I had listened to sermons on or touching on adoption and I cried through both of them. But this Sunday, the sermon was about dealing with uncertainty and hard times. And the major points are that we should pray, ask others to pray, pray specifically, and then celebrate in anticipation of victory. I have never had the confidence before to celebrate simply because I ANTICIPATED victory. But so many times aren’t we encouraged to do that? Knock and it will be opened. Ask and you will receive. And doesn’t Mark 11:24 say it all? “Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.”
I am choosing to believe the Maker and Creator, I am choosing to be comforted in ALL that he has promised me. Not because I am for one second worthy of one good thing, but because God has chosen to love me and Andrew.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
Do something.
I spent a long time not doing too much. Feeling super accomplished when I got everyone at my house bathed, fed, and clothed. Probably even patting myself on the back for doing the necessities. Sad huh?
Tim and I made an intentional move toward doing more for others this summer. I knew summer was my time to get this effort started, because I could always use work as my excuse during the school year. By doing more, we are still not doing much. But we aren’t just thinking only of ourselves as often anymore either.
I am not writing this to share with you our small acts, but rather our great blessings. Since we started to work more outwardly in our efforts to serve, we have seen such blessings. Last week was my first week of work, my parents cooked for us almost nightly. Sunday night Andrew was as sick as he has been in a year, and my sweet friend showed up with dinner for us. I have received incentives at work, and even started off my school year with “I love 1st grade” cookies made by a new friend that I greatly value. My classroom came together because my Aunt Tina and my grandmother sacrificed their time to contribute. And people I hugely admire I have told me lately they have been talking to God about me. Amazing to think that people that I love dearly can talk to my Creator about me?!
I encourage you to get out there and do more. Cook someone dinner or send a card. Invite someone to church or say a kind word to someone who you think is totally together and doesn’t even need to hear it (I have found it is those who usually really do!!).
Be blessed through your good works. I am truly watching it change my life.
Tim and I made an intentional move toward doing more for others this summer. I knew summer was my time to get this effort started, because I could always use work as my excuse during the school year. By doing more, we are still not doing much. But we aren’t just thinking only of ourselves as often anymore either.
I am not writing this to share with you our small acts, but rather our great blessings. Since we started to work more outwardly in our efforts to serve, we have seen such blessings. Last week was my first week of work, my parents cooked for us almost nightly. Sunday night Andrew was as sick as he has been in a year, and my sweet friend showed up with dinner for us. I have received incentives at work, and even started off my school year with “I love 1st grade” cookies made by a new friend that I greatly value. My classroom came together because my Aunt Tina and my grandmother sacrificed their time to contribute. And people I hugely admire I have told me lately they have been talking to God about me. Amazing to think that people that I love dearly can talk to my Creator about me?!
I encourage you to get out there and do more. Cook someone dinner or send a card. Invite someone to church or say a kind word to someone who you think is totally together and doesn’t even need to hear it (I have found it is those who usually really do!!).
Be blessed through your good works. I am truly watching it change my life.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Overly sensitive?
I can be overly sensitive. I know that. Ever since I was a little girl. I cry too easily. I get my feelings hurt too quickly. And once something happens, I do not get over it in a timely matter. It's me. And it is something I work on. Regularly.
I have to constantly ask myself in day to day things if I am being overly sensitive. And sometimes, the answer is yes. But there are also alot of times that I think I have permission to take things to heart.
When I take Andrew to the Doctor, they want me to prove that he is mine. They have run my insurance. They have let me know the amount I owe them, which is a good indicator that they know he has been approved as my dependent by my insurance provider. They know he is mine. But they still want to see it on paper. And as an adoptive mom, it offends me. The lady asked me for "custody" papers last week. Custody? I told her that I do not have custody, I have ownership. I told her that she would never ask me to prove on paper that Cates was mine. I try to always speak respectfully, but I am always happy to help enlighten people about fairness.
Another thing that I have to try not to be overly sensitive about is Andrew being a different race than we are. Sometimes people say the most insensitive things. I have to correct them, in love, but correct them. I don't want to be the mom walking around waiting for someone to cross me about my child, but I also want to make sure that I am always working to have people treat my family with respect. Growing up in the south I know that there will always be ignorance, but I hope that people will learn to see each other for who they are on the inside. That's what God sees. Our hearts. He doesn't care if we are tall or short, skinny or fat, red or polka dots. He cares if we love other people. He cares if we are honest. He cares about how much we care.
I want to be sensitive enough that I keep my tender heart. I want to continue to be affected by those in need. I want to continue to desire to help create positive change. But I do not want to be looking to be offended. I do not want to hold on to things that I should let go.
I am trying to find a balance of sensitivity. Bear with me while I learn.
I have to constantly ask myself in day to day things if I am being overly sensitive. And sometimes, the answer is yes. But there are also alot of times that I think I have permission to take things to heart.
When I take Andrew to the Doctor, they want me to prove that he is mine. They have run my insurance. They have let me know the amount I owe them, which is a good indicator that they know he has been approved as my dependent by my insurance provider. They know he is mine. But they still want to see it on paper. And as an adoptive mom, it offends me. The lady asked me for "custody" papers last week. Custody? I told her that I do not have custody, I have ownership. I told her that she would never ask me to prove on paper that Cates was mine. I try to always speak respectfully, but I am always happy to help enlighten people about fairness.
Another thing that I have to try not to be overly sensitive about is Andrew being a different race than we are. Sometimes people say the most insensitive things. I have to correct them, in love, but correct them. I don't want to be the mom walking around waiting for someone to cross me about my child, but I also want to make sure that I am always working to have people treat my family with respect. Growing up in the south I know that there will always be ignorance, but I hope that people will learn to see each other for who they are on the inside. That's what God sees. Our hearts. He doesn't care if we are tall or short, skinny or fat, red or polka dots. He cares if we love other people. He cares if we are honest. He cares about how much we care.
I want to be sensitive enough that I keep my tender heart. I want to continue to be affected by those in need. I want to continue to desire to help create positive change. But I do not want to be looking to be offended. I do not want to hold on to things that I should let go.
I am trying to find a balance of sensitivity. Bear with me while I learn.
Monday, June 4, 2012
Mommy Wars.
I don't have alot of strong feelings on the subject I am writing about today. There are battles going on that I am aware of, and sometimes contribute to my feelings of inadequacy, but I can honestly tell you I don't believe one is right over the other.
Formula vs. Breastfeeding
I read all the time on facebook, in blogs, parenting magazines about this conflict. Moms who breastfeed are somehow regarded as loving their children more, and having a greater desire for their childs well being. And breastfeeding does take sacrifice. I had a close friend who did it briefly, and I admired the effort. She told me it was like her body was not her own, and I totally got that. It is a wonderful thing for those who decide to do. It is selfless and to be respected. I am going to step out here though.. and let formula moms know.. you're good people too. Maybe it physically didn't work out for you, maybe you made a decision with your husband that it wasn't best for your family, maybe your baby was born with a mouth full of sharp teeth! Whatever the reason, you aren't less of a mom for choosing a bottle. To be honest, it is no one's business what you decided to feed your baby for the first few months, but if you feel the need to share it, make sure it is not in an effort to belittle someone who did it differently.
Work vs. Stay at Home
I feel like I have a good combination! I need to work in order to help take care of my family's physical needs, but I also get several good breaks in the year, and a wonderful summer at home. I am blessed. I have experienced my mom's tears when I was growing up because someone said something mean to her about working. Somehow they were a better mother than she was because they stayed home. I am pretty confident there are very few moms out there who were even my moms equal, much less superior. I have a working mom. A professional mom. I never felt slighted. I felt proud. Working moms regard their job raising children just as seriously as those who stay home. It is a different life. It is a balancing act. But it is just as wonderful. I have also seen stay at home moms looked down on.. "oh.. so you just sit at home all day." Ouch. No I chase small children all day. I clean up their 100 messes. I cut coupons and work on family budgets. I wake up early and stay up late. Stay at home moms are hard workers. Their work is respectable. And sometimes one wants to look down on the other in order to feel better about the life they are leading. And we don't have to do that. Work. Stay home. Do what works for you.. but don't feel like you're doing it the right way.. and everyone else is wrong.
Homeschool vs. Public School vs. Private School
I really want my children to be educated. I want them to have a good understanding of math, history, and I would like them to know how to speak and write crrectly. Where all of that happens is something I will decide later. All I know is.. where you send your children to school is your business. I am confident that you are doing what is very best for your children, and that works for me. And is best for your children I might not find is ehats best for mine, that's what makes the world go round.
We are all going to do things differently. Look at a mom who is doing something totally opposite than you and be proud of her. Don't let it make you feel inferior. Realize that different things work for different families. We spend alot of time walking around acting like we have it altogether, and on the inside feel like we aren't cutting it. Stop being so hard on yourself. I bet you go to bed most every night feeling like your children really love you. You are doing a great job. Let's stop being hard on each other, and start supporting one another. Let's end the Mommy Wars :)
Formula vs. Breastfeeding
I read all the time on facebook, in blogs, parenting magazines about this conflict. Moms who breastfeed are somehow regarded as loving their children more, and having a greater desire for their childs well being. And breastfeeding does take sacrifice. I had a close friend who did it briefly, and I admired the effort. She told me it was like her body was not her own, and I totally got that. It is a wonderful thing for those who decide to do. It is selfless and to be respected. I am going to step out here though.. and let formula moms know.. you're good people too. Maybe it physically didn't work out for you, maybe you made a decision with your husband that it wasn't best for your family, maybe your baby was born with a mouth full of sharp teeth! Whatever the reason, you aren't less of a mom for choosing a bottle. To be honest, it is no one's business what you decided to feed your baby for the first few months, but if you feel the need to share it, make sure it is not in an effort to belittle someone who did it differently.
Work vs. Stay at Home
I feel like I have a good combination! I need to work in order to help take care of my family's physical needs, but I also get several good breaks in the year, and a wonderful summer at home. I am blessed. I have experienced my mom's tears when I was growing up because someone said something mean to her about working. Somehow they were a better mother than she was because they stayed home. I am pretty confident there are very few moms out there who were even my moms equal, much less superior. I have a working mom. A professional mom. I never felt slighted. I felt proud. Working moms regard their job raising children just as seriously as those who stay home. It is a different life. It is a balancing act. But it is just as wonderful. I have also seen stay at home moms looked down on.. "oh.. so you just sit at home all day." Ouch. No I chase small children all day. I clean up their 100 messes. I cut coupons and work on family budgets. I wake up early and stay up late. Stay at home moms are hard workers. Their work is respectable. And sometimes one wants to look down on the other in order to feel better about the life they are leading. And we don't have to do that. Work. Stay home. Do what works for you.. but don't feel like you're doing it the right way.. and everyone else is wrong.
Homeschool vs. Public School vs. Private School
I really want my children to be educated. I want them to have a good understanding of math, history, and I would like them to know how to speak and write crrectly. Where all of that happens is something I will decide later. All I know is.. where you send your children to school is your business. I am confident that you are doing what is very best for your children, and that works for me. And is best for your children I might not find is ehats best for mine, that's what makes the world go round.
We are all going to do things differently. Look at a mom who is doing something totally opposite than you and be proud of her. Don't let it make you feel inferior. Realize that different things work for different families. We spend alot of time walking around acting like we have it altogether, and on the inside feel like we aren't cutting it. Stop being so hard on yourself. I bet you go to bed most every night feeling like your children really love you. You are doing a great job. Let's stop being hard on each other, and start supporting one another. Let's end the Mommy Wars :)
Wednesday, May 23, 2012
Diploma.
There are for sure times in my life that I have been much more proud to see those around me achieve, than I would have been for my own personal success.
When my students benchmark in reading. When they can see what working hard for a year can do, that is a moment that I find great joy. When Tim wins awards or is recognized, there is no greater happiness than what I feel for him. When my children reach milestones.. first roll, first word, first step.. great pride.
Last night was one of those days. Tiffany came to live with me when everyone said she shouldn’t. We have endured people’s negative opinions and tried to live better than what people expected. And it has not been easy. Tiffany came to live with us when she was 16. I was 25. Two children that I had deeply and dearly loved had just left. I was lost. And she knew it. No 25 year old is ever ready to raise a 16 year old. I guess we felt like we were as ready as anyone. And it has been a learning experience throughout.
I have had my patience and my will tested. I have been overwhelmed. I have felt like I absolutely would not be able to make it. And I have felt some of the greatest happiness. Teenagers are hard. Teenagers who are not yours are harder. Tiffany has taught me about sticking with someone. About believing in someone when they aren’t yet sure they believe in themselves. Tiffany has taught me about laughing at the little things, and choosing my battles.
She isn’t perfect. We have both endured one another’s mistakes. But she taught me a big lesson, and I want to share it with you.
Tiffany taught me about deciding to achieve. You see a lot of us were raised with both of our parents in pretty houses, and church on Sunday. Most of attended the same school most of our lives, and can associate our childhood memories with the same group of people.
That isn’t Tiffany. Tiffany has lived in nine different homes. She has been raised by a wide variety of people. She calls her siblings on occasion rather than getting to catch up with them at the nightly dinner table. She doesn’t even see her parents every year. There are scattered memories, and a lot people that she must spend a lot of time missing.
But she didn’t sit home and feel sorry for herself. She went to school, and learned. She went to work, and gave it her all. And because of that, when she walked down the field for graduation last night, she did so with honors. She wore Senior Beta Club recognition that certainly never graced my shoulders. She wore Honor Society cords that showed her hard work. Not easy work. Nobody handed it to her. She made a decision to not let where she came from keep her from where she can go. And I take great pride in that. I pray (and I ask you do the same) that she will stay motivated. That she will not let anything hinder her from earthly success, but most importantly that we will enjoy heaven together.
She graduated last night and started college today! Her plate is pretty full! She moves to North Alabama in the fall, but for the summer she will attend classes and work.
Thank you to the people who have supported her (and me!!) in her time in home. Please continue to do so.
“God doesn’t ask about our ability, only our availability; and if we prove our dependability, He will increase our capability.”
When my students benchmark in reading. When they can see what working hard for a year can do, that is a moment that I find great joy. When Tim wins awards or is recognized, there is no greater happiness than what I feel for him. When my children reach milestones.. first roll, first word, first step.. great pride.
Last night was one of those days. Tiffany came to live with me when everyone said she shouldn’t. We have endured people’s negative opinions and tried to live better than what people expected. And it has not been easy. Tiffany came to live with us when she was 16. I was 25. Two children that I had deeply and dearly loved had just left. I was lost. And she knew it. No 25 year old is ever ready to raise a 16 year old. I guess we felt like we were as ready as anyone. And it has been a learning experience throughout.
I have had my patience and my will tested. I have been overwhelmed. I have felt like I absolutely would not be able to make it. And I have felt some of the greatest happiness. Teenagers are hard. Teenagers who are not yours are harder. Tiffany has taught me about sticking with someone. About believing in someone when they aren’t yet sure they believe in themselves. Tiffany has taught me about laughing at the little things, and choosing my battles.
She isn’t perfect. We have both endured one another’s mistakes. But she taught me a big lesson, and I want to share it with you.
Tiffany taught me about deciding to achieve. You see a lot of us were raised with both of our parents in pretty houses, and church on Sunday. Most of attended the same school most of our lives, and can associate our childhood memories with the same group of people.
That isn’t Tiffany. Tiffany has lived in nine different homes. She has been raised by a wide variety of people. She calls her siblings on occasion rather than getting to catch up with them at the nightly dinner table. She doesn’t even see her parents every year. There are scattered memories, and a lot people that she must spend a lot of time missing.
But she didn’t sit home and feel sorry for herself. She went to school, and learned. She went to work, and gave it her all. And because of that, when she walked down the field for graduation last night, she did so with honors. She wore Senior Beta Club recognition that certainly never graced my shoulders. She wore Honor Society cords that showed her hard work. Not easy work. Nobody handed it to her. She made a decision to not let where she came from keep her from where she can go. And I take great pride in that. I pray (and I ask you do the same) that she will stay motivated. That she will not let anything hinder her from earthly success, but most importantly that we will enjoy heaven together.
She graduated last night and started college today! Her plate is pretty full! She moves to North Alabama in the fall, but for the summer she will attend classes and work.
Thank you to the people who have supported her (and me!!) in her time in home. Please continue to do so.
“God doesn’t ask about our ability, only our availability; and if we prove our dependability, He will increase our capability.”
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
What if..?
What if we lived out God's desires? What would the world be like?
I have an understanding that we all have different talents. Different abilities. But I also understand that we are real quick to make that our crutch. I could never... I am just not able to... It will negativly impact... What if instead of a thousand excuses why we cant, what if we did?
There would not be a lonely person tonight, because instead of sitting home watching tv, we would visit them. There would not be a hungry person, because instead of hoarding ALL of our food, we'd share it. There would not be an orphan, because we would open our homes.
I am as guilty as anyone. I like to be home in time for Wheel of Fortune (don't judge!). I like to be in bed by 9:00 or 9:30 (again, don't judge!). I like to be inside when it's hot, and snuggled up when it's cold. I love comfort. I love comfort too much. And I think alot of you do too. We have to get out there. We have to stop wanting to live this little white picket fence life with our perfect kids who look just like us, our friends who don't challenge us, and our jobs that consume us.
We have got to step out.
And that means that your house will probably be filled from time to time with all different kinds of people. It might mean that you give away as much as you keep, it might mean that your two thousand dollar vacation is five hundred this year. When we start really living and really giving and really being who God wants us to be, for most of us, our lives will look totally different.
Join me. Step out. Miss Wheel of Fortune. Visit someone lonely or discouraged. Babysit for a couple who needs a break. Share your possessions with people who need them far worse than you do. Open your home to strangers, and love them.
We can do it. We can live like Jesus. Let's start.
I have an understanding that we all have different talents. Different abilities. But I also understand that we are real quick to make that our crutch. I could never... I am just not able to... It will negativly impact... What if instead of a thousand excuses why we cant, what if we did?
There would not be a lonely person tonight, because instead of sitting home watching tv, we would visit them. There would not be a hungry person, because instead of hoarding ALL of our food, we'd share it. There would not be an orphan, because we would open our homes.
I am as guilty as anyone. I like to be home in time for Wheel of Fortune (don't judge!). I like to be in bed by 9:00 or 9:30 (again, don't judge!). I like to be inside when it's hot, and snuggled up when it's cold. I love comfort. I love comfort too much. And I think alot of you do too. We have to get out there. We have to stop wanting to live this little white picket fence life with our perfect kids who look just like us, our friends who don't challenge us, and our jobs that consume us.
We have got to step out.
And that means that your house will probably be filled from time to time with all different kinds of people. It might mean that you give away as much as you keep, it might mean that your two thousand dollar vacation is five hundred this year. When we start really living and really giving and really being who God wants us to be, for most of us, our lives will look totally different.
Join me. Step out. Miss Wheel of Fortune. Visit someone lonely or discouraged. Babysit for a couple who needs a break. Share your possessions with people who need them far worse than you do. Open your home to strangers, and love them.
We can do it. We can live like Jesus. Let's start.
Mother's Day!
Mother’s Day.
I have always valued Mother’s Day. I have appreciated the opportunity to express my appreciation and love for my mama and my grandmama. I always love choosing their gifts, and I love the feeling of giving to them. As an adult, I have even more greatly appreciated this time to remind them that they are precious to me.
We have a tradition of Mother’s Day corsages. Since I was about 16 I guess I have made sure my mom had hers, and my mom always makes sure that my grandmother has one. This year, I proudly wore my first Mother’s Day corsage. It was borderline ripped apart by my children, but when Tim gave it to me I felt officially like a mama ( I know the diapers, bottles, and up all nights have probably all also been indicators!! ) But it felt so good to carry on the tradition.
Tim took us to a nice dinner, and gave me the most thoughtful gifts. He works so hard to make sure special occasions are truly special. It is something that really means so much to me. I have decided to become a picture blogger asap so I will share pictures!
I had one sweet friend send me a card in the mail, and another give me beautiful earrings. My mama gave me a fish I had really been wanting for my pool fence. And someone I know through school saw us at lunch and paid for mine! I got several sweet text messages. So many people contributed to making my first official Mother’s Day so special.
I continually see God adding people to my life who mean more and more to me. I thank HIM regularly as well for the old faithfuls like Mama and Melissa Anne who are there to laugh and cry with me day after day.
I thank God for the sweet mamas who have had such an influence in my life. My mom, grandmom, aunts, Ms. Sharon, Ms. Mary David, Ms. Nellie, Ms. Lynn, and so so many more. God has blessed me so much. I hope I can share HIS blessings with others along the way.
I have always valued Mother’s Day. I have appreciated the opportunity to express my appreciation and love for my mama and my grandmama. I always love choosing their gifts, and I love the feeling of giving to them. As an adult, I have even more greatly appreciated this time to remind them that they are precious to me.
We have a tradition of Mother’s Day corsages. Since I was about 16 I guess I have made sure my mom had hers, and my mom always makes sure that my grandmother has one. This year, I proudly wore my first Mother’s Day corsage. It was borderline ripped apart by my children, but when Tim gave it to me I felt officially like a mama ( I know the diapers, bottles, and up all nights have probably all also been indicators!! ) But it felt so good to carry on the tradition.
Tim took us to a nice dinner, and gave me the most thoughtful gifts. He works so hard to make sure special occasions are truly special. It is something that really means so much to me. I have decided to become a picture blogger asap so I will share pictures!
I had one sweet friend send me a card in the mail, and another give me beautiful earrings. My mama gave me a fish I had really been wanting for my pool fence. And someone I know through school saw us at lunch and paid for mine! I got several sweet text messages. So many people contributed to making my first official Mother’s Day so special.
I continually see God adding people to my life who mean more and more to me. I thank HIM regularly as well for the old faithfuls like Mama and Melissa Anne who are there to laugh and cry with me day after day.
I thank God for the sweet mamas who have had such an influence in my life. My mom, grandmom, aunts, Ms. Sharon, Ms. Mary David, Ms. Nellie, Ms. Lynn, and so so many more. God has blessed me so much. I hope I can share HIS blessings with others along the way.
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Catching up with the Croleys :)
This was a big weekend for Cates Croley! She left the state for the first time, and she got her first tooth! Time with her is flying by, I am thankful for every single milestone. And I look forward to many more. I am trying to not to wish her small forever, but it is a precious time that I am not taking forgranted for one minute!
We had a great family weekend at the Cotton Pickin’ Fair in Georgia. It was hot, so we look forward to visiting in October next time! Occasionally Andrew has a strong two year old moment, but for the most part my children are super easy! As long as I keep them changed and fed they pretty much go with the flow! They make short trips so much fun and I love that Tim takes us out and about fairly often!
Summer is rapidly approaching and this is a happy mama! I look forward to lazy (and sometimes productive) days around the house, pool time, beach time, and family time I have a great love of summer, and I expect this may be the best one yet!!
Sunday will be my first Mother’s Day with children who carry my last name. We have modestly celebrated in the past, primarily for the benefit of the children who needed a “mama” to honor on this day, but I have always kept it at a distance to protect myself from a hurt heart when the children had to go. This year I plan to enjoy every single minute! I am officially two tiny people’s forever mama and that surely is something to be celebrated!
Occasionally I just like to post a catch up with the croley’s blog so I can note significant times in our lives! This is one of those!
We had a great family weekend at the Cotton Pickin’ Fair in Georgia. It was hot, so we look forward to visiting in October next time! Occasionally Andrew has a strong two year old moment, but for the most part my children are super easy! As long as I keep them changed and fed they pretty much go with the flow! They make short trips so much fun and I love that Tim takes us out and about fairly often!
Summer is rapidly approaching and this is a happy mama! I look forward to lazy (and sometimes productive) days around the house, pool time, beach time, and family time I have a great love of summer, and I expect this may be the best one yet!!
Sunday will be my first Mother’s Day with children who carry my last name. We have modestly celebrated in the past, primarily for the benefit of the children who needed a “mama” to honor on this day, but I have always kept it at a distance to protect myself from a hurt heart when the children had to go. This year I plan to enjoy every single minute! I am officially two tiny people’s forever mama and that surely is something to be celebrated!
Occasionally I just like to post a catch up with the croley’s blog so I can note significant times in our lives! This is one of those!
Friday, May 4, 2012
Full plate.
People around me are always talking about how stressed they are. Stressed due to responsibilities at work, home, church, with friends and family. Stressed.
And sometimes I get caught in that mindset. I spend my day with children literally from the moment I wake up until the moment we all pass out. I start my day with my own.. trying to feed, change, dress. I spend the next eight to nine hours with my students.. trying to teach, reteach, love, and repeat. I come back home and there are papers to sign, dinner to cook, bottles to make, bathes to give, prayers to pray, and so on. And that's alot.
But what would I do without it?! What would I do with all my time? I love waking up to Cates' coos. I love hear "Mrs. Croleyyyyyyyy" all day. I love the life I lead, and I love love love the people in it!
The truth is, I am not stressed. I am busy. I lead a full life. I am blessed beyond measure with things to fill my days.
My plate is full, and I am thankful for it.
And sometimes I get caught in that mindset. I spend my day with children literally from the moment I wake up until the moment we all pass out. I start my day with my own.. trying to feed, change, dress. I spend the next eight to nine hours with my students.. trying to teach, reteach, love, and repeat. I come back home and there are papers to sign, dinner to cook, bottles to make, bathes to give, prayers to pray, and so on. And that's alot.
But what would I do without it?! What would I do with all my time? I love waking up to Cates' coos. I love hear "Mrs. Croleyyyyyyyy" all day. I love the life I lead, and I love love love the people in it!
The truth is, I am not stressed. I am busy. I lead a full life. I am blessed beyond measure with things to fill my days.
My plate is full, and I am thankful for it.
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Sweet James
When I met Lena Tucker I thought she was probably the bubbliest person who ever lived. She doesn’t have a quiet voice. She is outgoing and funny. And she’s a deep down good person. We pledged Delta together in the fall of 2003. My memories are about how tough she was, and how close our whole pledge class felt that year.
She also had a really sweet boyfriend, Andy. They were high school sweethearts and you’d always catch them holding hands or talking sweet. I remember one “anniversary”, he cooked her dinner and had a beautiful table set up just outside the law school. I guess I saw a lot of Tim and me in them. You knew they were in it for the long haul.
And at her candlelighting to announce her engagement, I might have been more excited than she was! I was standing by her and when that candle came around, and she blew it out. I jumped with excitement. She has the funniest picture of me that night. It was a wonderful time!
And we’ve grown up. And I see her at some church events, and I follow her on facebook. She is a teacher. She recently got her master’s. And she has become very successful.
When I tell you these are good people. That is what I mean. Really good people.
They were blessed with a little boy in April. Sweet James Brewster. And early this morning, he went to be with his Heavenly Father. And it hurts me for them. And I have cried so many tears. But I do find comfort in the strong people they are. I know that they totally trust God. And today, when people who are not as strong would fall apart. I know they are leaning on God. I am so happy to know that they will get to spend forever in heaven with their son. And I hope that thought brings them so much peace. I know the days, and weeks, and months ahead will be so hard for them. And I am going to do my best to pray for them every single day. And I hope you will too.
James has had an impact on my life. He has reminded me how important it is that I live for Jesus, and teach my children to do the same. I want my family to all share heaven together, and I know that I need to live right, and do my best to help those around me do the same for that to happen. James twelve days on this earth softened my heart, I know he made a difference for some many others as well.
Praise God for sharing baby James with us, even if for just a little while.
She also had a really sweet boyfriend, Andy. They were high school sweethearts and you’d always catch them holding hands or talking sweet. I remember one “anniversary”, he cooked her dinner and had a beautiful table set up just outside the law school. I guess I saw a lot of Tim and me in them. You knew they were in it for the long haul.
And at her candlelighting to announce her engagement, I might have been more excited than she was! I was standing by her and when that candle came around, and she blew it out. I jumped with excitement. She has the funniest picture of me that night. It was a wonderful time!
And we’ve grown up. And I see her at some church events, and I follow her on facebook. She is a teacher. She recently got her master’s. And she has become very successful.
When I tell you these are good people. That is what I mean. Really good people.
They were blessed with a little boy in April. Sweet James Brewster. And early this morning, he went to be with his Heavenly Father. And it hurts me for them. And I have cried so many tears. But I do find comfort in the strong people they are. I know that they totally trust God. And today, when people who are not as strong would fall apart. I know they are leaning on God. I am so happy to know that they will get to spend forever in heaven with their son. And I hope that thought brings them so much peace. I know the days, and weeks, and months ahead will be so hard for them. And I am going to do my best to pray for them every single day. And I hope you will too.
James has had an impact on my life. He has reminded me how important it is that I live for Jesus, and teach my children to do the same. I want my family to all share heaven together, and I know that I need to live right, and do my best to help those around me do the same for that to happen. James twelve days on this earth softened my heart, I know he made a difference for some many others as well.
Praise God for sharing baby James with us, even if for just a little while.
My daddy :)
My daddy
I know a lot of selfish people. People who just want to do for themselves, have fun, and let other people deal with their own problems. And some days, I am one of those people. It is hard not to be selfish! I am not going to go old school and harp on this day and age, but I do think that more and more people are taught that success is found in making sure that you make yourself happy. And that could not be more wrong. I know that I am happiest when I am doing for someone else. I am happiest when my sacrifice is the greatest. I wish we taught that more. I wish we provided more opportunities for people to feel the true joy that comes from thinking of your self less, and other more.
My daddy is not selfish. He is the most giving person I know.
When Tim and I were first married we started taking up time with two boys in town who needed attention. We have continued to do this as the years have passed. It has gotten harder and harder though to do as much with our own children and obligations. My daddy has picked up the slack for us. He invites them to work with him so they can learn about earning money, he cooks for them, brags on them, and takes them to movies and other fun things! They tell me all the time he is like their granddad! He loves them, and they love him. To think about the two lives he is touching just by being there, and caring, and showing up when a lot of times other people don’t is pretty amazing.
My daddy is ALWAYS there.
I tell him all the time that I need him more as I get older and not less (as he might have hoped!). He helps Tim and I as we work to figure out adult problems/situations. He picks up my children when we need him to. He invites Andrew EVERYWHERE he goes. He is the most present person in our family’s day to day.
He really loves me.
My daddy calls me everyday after work. He comes by every chance he gets. He texts me. He cooks me breakfast some mornings, and brings me lunch some days. He invites us all over for dinner pretty regularly too! He hugs us and kisses us! And I love it when he tells Tim he loves him. Because he really does. It is a wonderful feeling to feel really cherished by someone, and I do by my daddy!!
He’s a worker!!
He has always worked hard at his job and received many accolades along the way. But he works everywhere he goes! He is always working in his yard (or mine!). Helping Bert in the box of whatever sport he is coaching, helping me with school fundraisers or work days. He is always working somewhere for someone! I think that is a lot of the reason I looked for a worker in the man I married. It was what I saw my whole life!
I love, love, love, love my daddy!
I know a lot of selfish people. People who just want to do for themselves, have fun, and let other people deal with their own problems. And some days, I am one of those people. It is hard not to be selfish! I am not going to go old school and harp on this day and age, but I do think that more and more people are taught that success is found in making sure that you make yourself happy. And that could not be more wrong. I know that I am happiest when I am doing for someone else. I am happiest when my sacrifice is the greatest. I wish we taught that more. I wish we provided more opportunities for people to feel the true joy that comes from thinking of your self less, and other more.
My daddy is not selfish. He is the most giving person I know.
When Tim and I were first married we started taking up time with two boys in town who needed attention. We have continued to do this as the years have passed. It has gotten harder and harder though to do as much with our own children and obligations. My daddy has picked up the slack for us. He invites them to work with him so they can learn about earning money, he cooks for them, brags on them, and takes them to movies and other fun things! They tell me all the time he is like their granddad! He loves them, and they love him. To think about the two lives he is touching just by being there, and caring, and showing up when a lot of times other people don’t is pretty amazing.
My daddy is ALWAYS there.
I tell him all the time that I need him more as I get older and not less (as he might have hoped!). He helps Tim and I as we work to figure out adult problems/situations. He picks up my children when we need him to. He invites Andrew EVERYWHERE he goes. He is the most present person in our family’s day to day.
He really loves me.
My daddy calls me everyday after work. He comes by every chance he gets. He texts me. He cooks me breakfast some mornings, and brings me lunch some days. He invites us all over for dinner pretty regularly too! He hugs us and kisses us! And I love it when he tells Tim he loves him. Because he really does. It is a wonderful feeling to feel really cherished by someone, and I do by my daddy!!
He’s a worker!!
He has always worked hard at his job and received many accolades along the way. But he works everywhere he goes! He is always working in his yard (or mine!). Helping Bert in the box of whatever sport he is coaching, helping me with school fundraisers or work days. He is always working somewhere for someone! I think that is a lot of the reason I looked for a worker in the man I married. It was what I saw my whole life!
I love, love, love, love my daddy!
Friday, April 27, 2012
Together.
Growing up my parents spent alot of time together. And we did most everything as a family. I remember many car trips singing rounds of.. row, row, row your boat.. and they are sweet memories that I truly cherish. And I guess they were my example.
Tim and I spend alot of time together. On the weekends, if you see one of us you will probably see the other. Sometimes people have smart comments, but I love that we love to be together! Weeks are rushed and weekends are precious to me. It is when I am able to take time to really appreciate us as husband and wife, and a family. I love the fact that he will get up and go to yard sales with me, and I make sure I attend my fair share of ballgames. I just really love being with him. There are days like in all marriages that we have to take a step back, but I can without reservation tell you that Tim is my very best friend. God knew I needed not just a husband, but a friend. And that is truly what He gave me.
I do love friend time. I deeply value girls dinners, and time with mom. My world would be much less colorful without my sweet girlfriends! And I love that he has Friday night football with his friends. I know that those Friday nights mean alot to him. And his hunting (which I just cannot enjoy!!).
But I also really love that we aren't just passing each other in the hallway. I love that we aren't just recounting big events to each other, but sharing them. I love being married. And I love Tim :)
Tim and I spend alot of time together. On the weekends, if you see one of us you will probably see the other. Sometimes people have smart comments, but I love that we love to be together! Weeks are rushed and weekends are precious to me. It is when I am able to take time to really appreciate us as husband and wife, and a family. I love the fact that he will get up and go to yard sales with me, and I make sure I attend my fair share of ballgames. I just really love being with him. There are days like in all marriages that we have to take a step back, but I can without reservation tell you that Tim is my very best friend. God knew I needed not just a husband, but a friend. And that is truly what He gave me.
I do love friend time. I deeply value girls dinners, and time with mom. My world would be much less colorful without my sweet girlfriends! And I love that he has Friday night football with his friends. I know that those Friday nights mean alot to him. And his hunting (which I just cannot enjoy!!).
But I also really love that we aren't just passing each other in the hallway. I love that we aren't just recounting big events to each other, but sharing them. I love being married. And I love Tim :)
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Color..blind?
I read a blog today. It is written by a mama that I do not know. She had to write it because her little four year old girl, who she adopted, was uninvited from a family member's birthday celebration. I wanted to cry. She was uninvited, because she is HIV positive. A life sentence that she will serve from no fault of her own. My first thought was, what brave people to adopt her. She could have very easily spent her life in an orphanage because no one was willing to be educated on her disease. Her new parents decided to share her condition in order to help educate others, and I guess now are feeling the negative reactions from their news.
And it hurt me. It hurt me for the mama of the beautiful little girl. It her me that her baby will grow up treated differently.
I guess part of the reason it hurt me is because it made me think of my own family. I have prayed many prayers that God would soften the hearts of those who know and love us and allow them to totally accept us as a family. Different colors and all. And for the most part, that is exactly what has happened. But I know there will come a day that someone (I envision a mean little kid on the playground) will point out to Andrew that he is a different color than his mom. And I hope at that the moment, the years of deep down love that he has felt from us totally over takes him and he is able to brush it off. But I worry that it will hurt him. And that he will feel different. And that brings tears to my eyes.
I know so many families that have recently adopted children of different races. The Godwins and The Phillips both adopted beautiful brown little girls about the time we adopted Andrew. And I thank God that more and more people are expanding the much too narrow definition of family. Heaven will be as colorful as a rainbow, so I am glad that earthly families are reflecting this as well.
Everyday I am reminded that family is not a group of people bound by blood. It is a group of people bound by love. My family far exceeds those who simply share my bloodline. It is filled with sweet friends, in laws, church family, and because of the beauty of adoption it includes two precious cousins that have held my heart since the first night I met them. And my son. My sweet boy who I would not have the priviledge of raising if it were not for family meaning so much more than just being born into a group.
I want you to join me in an effort to acknowledge families beautiful differences. We can't pretend we are all pasty white! Differences are something I think should be celebrated! And encourage. I know encouragement is something I long for somedays. And I hope that you will encourage my son and daughter as they grow. I know that Cates too will probably at some point have to endure that playground bully, and it will be just fine with me if she knocks them out :)
Let's all be more tolerant of difference whether opinions or physical traits. Let's all love each other more. And let's all let each other know it every chance we get!
I also want to ask your continued prayers for my sweet college friend Lena and her baby boy James. He is undergoing very difficult surgery. Tim and I have prayed and begged. And I know, I really do know, that God will provide for this precious family. His ways are so much more than we can begin to understand. Pray, pray, pray.
And it hurt me. It hurt me for the mama of the beautiful little girl. It her me that her baby will grow up treated differently.
I guess part of the reason it hurt me is because it made me think of my own family. I have prayed many prayers that God would soften the hearts of those who know and love us and allow them to totally accept us as a family. Different colors and all. And for the most part, that is exactly what has happened. But I know there will come a day that someone (I envision a mean little kid on the playground) will point out to Andrew that he is a different color than his mom. And I hope at that the moment, the years of deep down love that he has felt from us totally over takes him and he is able to brush it off. But I worry that it will hurt him. And that he will feel different. And that brings tears to my eyes.
I know so many families that have recently adopted children of different races. The Godwins and The Phillips both adopted beautiful brown little girls about the time we adopted Andrew. And I thank God that more and more people are expanding the much too narrow definition of family. Heaven will be as colorful as a rainbow, so I am glad that earthly families are reflecting this as well.
Everyday I am reminded that family is not a group of people bound by blood. It is a group of people bound by love. My family far exceeds those who simply share my bloodline. It is filled with sweet friends, in laws, church family, and because of the beauty of adoption it includes two precious cousins that have held my heart since the first night I met them. And my son. My sweet boy who I would not have the priviledge of raising if it were not for family meaning so much more than just being born into a group.
I want you to join me in an effort to acknowledge families beautiful differences. We can't pretend we are all pasty white! Differences are something I think should be celebrated! And encourage. I know encouragement is something I long for somedays. And I hope that you will encourage my son and daughter as they grow. I know that Cates too will probably at some point have to endure that playground bully, and it will be just fine with me if she knocks them out :)
Let's all be more tolerant of difference whether opinions or physical traits. Let's all love each other more. And let's all let each other know it every chance we get!
I also want to ask your continued prayers for my sweet college friend Lena and her baby boy James. He is undergoing very difficult surgery. Tim and I have prayed and begged. And I know, I really do know, that God will provide for this precious family. His ways are so much more than we can begin to understand. Pray, pray, pray.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
My Mama
I want to share with you some things that my mama taught me. Things that no doubt have helped make me who I am today. And I hope my children will learn from me as well.
Don't Dwell, Solve.
Growing up, we didn't spend alot of time complaining about problems, we were taught to fix them. There wasn't room for pouting, and feeling like a victim.. if there was a problem.. you should pray about it.. and then to the best of your ability find a solution. I see myself as an adult doing this all the time.. I see myself being presented with a problem at home or work.. and instead of feeling sorry for myself..I immediately start thinking of the best way to solve the issue at hand. When you let problems stack, when you leave things unresolved, that can leave alot of room for baggage and bridges burned. My mama made me a solver.
Do good, regardless.
It isn't always easy to help others. Alot of times money is low, extra time is rare, and I want someone helping me instead of being helpful. My mom has lived a life of giving. And most of the time, she does it without anyone knowing. She buys gifts for people in need at Christmas, she cooks for whoever is sick (or at least purchases a meal :) ), she is always thinking of someone else.
Work Hard. She is a worker. And not only is she a hard worker, she almost always finds success. People respect her business abilities. I know I do. I have witnessed her professionalism, and her desire to achieve. Ever since I was a little girl I have admired her work ethic. She has inspired in me the desire to do my very best everyday. And I have seen the fruits of my labor over and over again.
Family Matters.
Mama always put us and dad first. Still does. And her grandchildren of course! She didn't miss ballgames or big days. We were allowed to be free thinkers, and she listened to us. Alot of days, I don't feel listened to. But I do always feel like my mama hears me. She taught us to look out for one another. And value each other. Even today, my brother and I don't always get along. We are just different people. But if he ever needed me for one second my world would stop to see about him, and I know he would do the same for me.
Forgive.
Now that does not mean that you will always hear her apologize. Because she doesn't! It doesn't mean that she always gives in, or bows down. But she does forgive. Sometimes it will be a quiet forgiveness that just moves on, sometimes it will be verbalized. But with me, once she has forgiven me, we move on. She doesn't throw it in my face a week, or month, or year later. She doesn't harp. She forgives the right way. She wipes your slate clean and provides you with a new opportunity. I need to continue to learn from her. I need to work on giving new chances, and leaving the past behind. She has taught me so many things. She is a dear friend to me. And one of the people I am most proud to know. She is a fantastic mom, and a fabulous grandmom too. So thankful for her :) And don't worry dad.. your blog will be next! :)
Don't Dwell, Solve.
Growing up, we didn't spend alot of time complaining about problems, we were taught to fix them. There wasn't room for pouting, and feeling like a victim.. if there was a problem.. you should pray about it.. and then to the best of your ability find a solution. I see myself as an adult doing this all the time.. I see myself being presented with a problem at home or work.. and instead of feeling sorry for myself..I immediately start thinking of the best way to solve the issue at hand. When you let problems stack, when you leave things unresolved, that can leave alot of room for baggage and bridges burned. My mama made me a solver.
Do good, regardless.
It isn't always easy to help others. Alot of times money is low, extra time is rare, and I want someone helping me instead of being helpful. My mom has lived a life of giving. And most of the time, she does it without anyone knowing. She buys gifts for people in need at Christmas, she cooks for whoever is sick (or at least purchases a meal :) ), she is always thinking of someone else.
Work Hard. She is a worker. And not only is she a hard worker, she almost always finds success. People respect her business abilities. I know I do. I have witnessed her professionalism, and her desire to achieve. Ever since I was a little girl I have admired her work ethic. She has inspired in me the desire to do my very best everyday. And I have seen the fruits of my labor over and over again.
Family Matters.
Mama always put us and dad first. Still does. And her grandchildren of course! She didn't miss ballgames or big days. We were allowed to be free thinkers, and she listened to us. Alot of days, I don't feel listened to. But I do always feel like my mama hears me. She taught us to look out for one another. And value each other. Even today, my brother and I don't always get along. We are just different people. But if he ever needed me for one second my world would stop to see about him, and I know he would do the same for me.
Forgive.
Now that does not mean that you will always hear her apologize. Because she doesn't! It doesn't mean that she always gives in, or bows down. But she does forgive. Sometimes it will be a quiet forgiveness that just moves on, sometimes it will be verbalized. But with me, once she has forgiven me, we move on. She doesn't throw it in my face a week, or month, or year later. She doesn't harp. She forgives the right way. She wipes your slate clean and provides you with a new opportunity. I need to continue to learn from her. I need to work on giving new chances, and leaving the past behind. She has taught me so many things. She is a dear friend to me. And one of the people I am most proud to know. She is a fantastic mom, and a fabulous grandmom too. So thankful for her :) And don't worry dad.. your blog will be next! :)
Teenagers.
You know I try not to be shy about sharing things I learn the hard way. I guess that it keeps my pride in check, and maybe it can help check yours too! (if needed, of course) I have raised a teenager for almost two and half years now. Not two and a half easy years, but I am able to say that they have been educational and at times inspiring. In this time I have been aggrevated at times with other teen parents. I thought.. wow, they straight let them run wild, or why are they giving up on them this late in the game?! I would see them wearing things that I know probably wasn't best, I would hear them say things that I knew they should know better than to say, their facebooks would make me blush, and through all of this I have thought... WHERE IS YOUR MAMA???????
Now I know the answer to what's happening with their parents. They are tired. And by tired I mean, even if they wanted to say stop, don't do it, they literally have lost the energy to say it. I know this because after 2.5 years I am tired. I am tired of correcting. I am tired of redirecting. I am tired.
Now, does that mean we should give up? No. Does that justify lowering our standard to prevent more draining arguments? No.
But what it does mean is.. we need to give each other a break. And, if you are close enough to a teenager to help them stay on track.. please do so! Sometimes one person can only say something so many times before it is totally tuned out. And maybe these tired mamas are still trying, and they are just being ignored. All I know is.. it takes a team. If you know my teenager and have an opportunity to encourage or reprimand her. Please do so. I need your help. So do other mamas. Let's all help each other.. college is just around the corner! (kidding, well mostly kidding.)
Now I know the answer to what's happening with their parents. They are tired. And by tired I mean, even if they wanted to say stop, don't do it, they literally have lost the energy to say it. I know this because after 2.5 years I am tired. I am tired of correcting. I am tired of redirecting. I am tired.
Now, does that mean we should give up? No. Does that justify lowering our standard to prevent more draining arguments? No.
But what it does mean is.. we need to give each other a break. And, if you are close enough to a teenager to help them stay on track.. please do so! Sometimes one person can only say something so many times before it is totally tuned out. And maybe these tired mamas are still trying, and they are just being ignored. All I know is.. it takes a team. If you know my teenager and have an opportunity to encourage or reprimand her. Please do so. I need your help. So do other mamas. Let's all help each other.. college is just around the corner! (kidding, well mostly kidding.)
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Catching Up! :)
Cates goes to her first day of daycare tomorrow. And it makes me sad. Pray for her, and for her mama. I know daycare is super positive for her development and social skills. But I have loved her riding with me everyday, and I have rushed after work to pick her up. Tim will take her now.. but its only about 40 days til summer.. and I can handle that :) Also, she will be with Andrew, and I look forward to their bond being so close in age. So that is a positive.
Tim turned 29 yesterday! It was alot of fun. We had breakfast, and then we went to the Zoo. We looked at animals.. and rode the train.. and it was alot of fun :) His last year in the 20's. I know it will be fantastic!
I won a field trip grant so we will be taking our sweet first graders on a field trip Thursday and then we are off work on Friday! I know that this week will be alot of fun and I look forward to Easter weekend :) Friday night Tiffany is going to a prom in Montgomery, and Saturday I hope it is pretty enough to be by the pool, Sunday the Easter Bunny will hopefully hop on in.
We continue to be humbled by and thankful for our many blessings. God is good.
Tim turned 29 yesterday! It was alot of fun. We had breakfast, and then we went to the Zoo. We looked at animals.. and rode the train.. and it was alot of fun :) His last year in the 20's. I know it will be fantastic!
I won a field trip grant so we will be taking our sweet first graders on a field trip Thursday and then we are off work on Friday! I know that this week will be alot of fun and I look forward to Easter weekend :) Friday night Tiffany is going to a prom in Montgomery, and Saturday I hope it is pretty enough to be by the pool, Sunday the Easter Bunny will hopefully hop on in.
We continue to be humbled by and thankful for our many blessings. God is good.
Friday, March 16, 2012
I get by with a little help from my friends... :)
Cates isnt sleeping through the night yet. She is newly four months old. Andrew slept through the night at about seven weeks. So I was spoiled. And now, I am tired :) I have caught myself being a little snippy with people as bed time approaches. Be patient with me :)
Cates is doing great, and Andrew is good too. Tiffany continues to make us proud by who she is becoming. When I think about where we were last year, and where we are now.. how far we have come. She is such a blessing and a positive influence in my life. I hope that Cates and Andrew will grow up to be as hardworking and positive as Tiffany is.. she is such a benefit to our family.
School is in full swing and we are all making alot of progress. I am proud of my class and I feel like they are almost ready to be second graders! God is good. I am blessed by my job.
Lauren rescued Cates from daycare at 8 weeks old. My heart just was not ready for her to go there yet. Lauren very selflessly offered to take her into her own home. What a blessing. I know the meaning of there being a friend who sticks closer than a brother (not that I dont love my brother!!) There just are friendships that are sure similar to family. I am thankful for friends who dont always think just like me, friends I can disagree with, and friends that I love and who love me. I see blessings everytime I stop to look. I feel more ready for daycare now, so sweet Cates will start in April and just go until school lets out in May. Praise for a job with summers for my children!
This weekend we will celebrate my grandmothers birthday :) What a special celebration.
More soon.
Cates is doing great, and Andrew is good too. Tiffany continues to make us proud by who she is becoming. When I think about where we were last year, and where we are now.. how far we have come. She is such a blessing and a positive influence in my life. I hope that Cates and Andrew will grow up to be as hardworking and positive as Tiffany is.. she is such a benefit to our family.
School is in full swing and we are all making alot of progress. I am proud of my class and I feel like they are almost ready to be second graders! God is good. I am blessed by my job.
Lauren rescued Cates from daycare at 8 weeks old. My heart just was not ready for her to go there yet. Lauren very selflessly offered to take her into her own home. What a blessing. I know the meaning of there being a friend who sticks closer than a brother (not that I dont love my brother!!) There just are friendships that are sure similar to family. I am thankful for friends who dont always think just like me, friends I can disagree with, and friends that I love and who love me. I see blessings everytime I stop to look. I feel more ready for daycare now, so sweet Cates will start in April and just go until school lets out in May. Praise for a job with summers for my children!
This weekend we will celebrate my grandmothers birthday :) What a special celebration.
More soon.
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Be there.
Be there.
I have made a great effort since the first of the year to be there. And by be there I mean attend events that are important to the people I care about. In the past I have made excuses for my absenteeism. I am tired. My presence is not that important. I don’t have the extra cash for a gift. Plenty of other people will go. There are so many reasons we can come up with to miss things. What if we all really committed to being there for each other?
I have taken my just had a baby self to wedding showers, I have attended birthday parties where I was not totally comfortable, been to out of town baby showers where I didn’t know too many people, I have returned home early from trips, just to be there. Not always because it was just what I wanted to do (lets be real, this girl loves to nap!), and maybe sometimes for not the perfect reasons, but nonetheless, I have been there. And you know what? I have gotten a lot from it. I have gotten a lot from it because for the most part, it doesn’t matter how nice the gift you bring is, it doesn’t matter if you are a few minutes late or leave a little early, for people to see that with a million other things going on in the world you decided to be there with them on their day.. that is sincere appreciation and it strengthens relationships.
My grandmother has always been a “be there” person. She is selfless with her time (which to me is harder than being selfless with money). And another lady from my church that is always there is Ms. Rebecca, you know if she is not there something came up. You can count on her for church events and showers and there is just something special about people you can really always count on to support events. I want to be one of those people.
Now this is not a promise to never miss a party. Things do come up. My first earthly obligation is my family so if Tim or my children have something going on that will always come first. But, whenever I can, whether I really feel like it or not, you can count on seeing my smiling face!
I encourage you to join me in “being there”. I can almost guarantee you no one will remember how great your gift was, or if your clothes matched, or if you smiled the whole time you were there, people probably wont remember that your child cried nonstop, or that you looked tired from work, or kids, or whatever it may be… but you know what they will remember.. seeing you there. Knowing that in a world where commitment can be difficult to find, you were committed to making them your priority on that day. Pretty priceless.
Thankful for those people who have been there for me and looking forward to being that person for others!
I have made a great effort since the first of the year to be there. And by be there I mean attend events that are important to the people I care about. In the past I have made excuses for my absenteeism. I am tired. My presence is not that important. I don’t have the extra cash for a gift. Plenty of other people will go. There are so many reasons we can come up with to miss things. What if we all really committed to being there for each other?
I have taken my just had a baby self to wedding showers, I have attended birthday parties where I was not totally comfortable, been to out of town baby showers where I didn’t know too many people, I have returned home early from trips, just to be there. Not always because it was just what I wanted to do (lets be real, this girl loves to nap!), and maybe sometimes for not the perfect reasons, but nonetheless, I have been there. And you know what? I have gotten a lot from it. I have gotten a lot from it because for the most part, it doesn’t matter how nice the gift you bring is, it doesn’t matter if you are a few minutes late or leave a little early, for people to see that with a million other things going on in the world you decided to be there with them on their day.. that is sincere appreciation and it strengthens relationships.
My grandmother has always been a “be there” person. She is selfless with her time (which to me is harder than being selfless with money). And another lady from my church that is always there is Ms. Rebecca, you know if she is not there something came up. You can count on her for church events and showers and there is just something special about people you can really always count on to support events. I want to be one of those people.
Now this is not a promise to never miss a party. Things do come up. My first earthly obligation is my family so if Tim or my children have something going on that will always come first. But, whenever I can, whether I really feel like it or not, you can count on seeing my smiling face!
I encourage you to join me in “being there”. I can almost guarantee you no one will remember how great your gift was, or if your clothes matched, or if you smiled the whole time you were there, people probably wont remember that your child cried nonstop, or that you looked tired from work, or kids, or whatever it may be… but you know what they will remember.. seeing you there. Knowing that in a world where commitment can be difficult to find, you were committed to making them your priority on that day. Pretty priceless.
Thankful for those people who have been there for me and looking forward to being that person for others!
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Tired.. and new understanding.
I think it is okay to tell you, I am tired. Like deep down, eyes burning, hurts on the inside tired. It is a good tired. A tired that reminds me about my two sweet babies, my very involved teenager, my full time job, my special marriage, and the rest of my family obligations. But nonetheless, I am tired.
There are so many things that having Cates has taught me. Important life lessons. Like.. go ahead and make alot of bottles at once.. at 2am you will be glad you did. The great value in choosing my battles. Do I really care if Tiffany left her shoes in the middle of the floor.. I mean let's be honest.. they are probably right next to mine.
But I think one of the most valuable things I have learned is.. invest in people who love you.
We could all get lost in the people who dont show up when we think they should. We could all feel sorry for ourselves when someone doesnt agree with us, or says something negative in our direction. I could and have in the past totally consumed myself with making everyone happy. And I can honestly tell you the first night I held Cates in my arms, after our friends and family had gone, I felt a peace I never felt before. Thirty five people visited us in the hospital. How could my feelings be hurt over the ones who did not? Seventy five people shared their love for our sweet family at Andrew's adoption party.. really why would I waste one second thinking about the people who missed out. I dont want to be someone who sees negative and misses the beauty of so much positivity that is around me. My time matters more now since having Cates and adopting Andrew, I can no longer waste my emotions on feeling sad about things that are so small in comparison to the absolutely beautiful, wonderful things that are all around me. I am thankful daily for the people who have invested in me and my family, I only hope I can he a small part of the blessing so many are to me.
Peace. What a wonderful feeling.
There are so many things that having Cates has taught me. Important life lessons. Like.. go ahead and make alot of bottles at once.. at 2am you will be glad you did. The great value in choosing my battles. Do I really care if Tiffany left her shoes in the middle of the floor.. I mean let's be honest.. they are probably right next to mine.
But I think one of the most valuable things I have learned is.. invest in people who love you.
We could all get lost in the people who dont show up when we think they should. We could all feel sorry for ourselves when someone doesnt agree with us, or says something negative in our direction. I could and have in the past totally consumed myself with making everyone happy. And I can honestly tell you the first night I held Cates in my arms, after our friends and family had gone, I felt a peace I never felt before. Thirty five people visited us in the hospital. How could my feelings be hurt over the ones who did not? Seventy five people shared their love for our sweet family at Andrew's adoption party.. really why would I waste one second thinking about the people who missed out. I dont want to be someone who sees negative and misses the beauty of so much positivity that is around me. My time matters more now since having Cates and adopting Andrew, I can no longer waste my emotions on feeling sad about things that are so small in comparison to the absolutely beautiful, wonderful things that are all around me. I am thankful daily for the people who have invested in me and my family, I only hope I can he a small part of the blessing so many are to me.
Peace. What a wonderful feeling.
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Citizen of the Year
Rarely in life are we recognized. We go to work, we are involved at school and church, we spend all day long doing our very best. And we don't do it because we want to be smothered with thank yous.. but when someone does stop to say.. good job.. that matters doesn't it? That makes it feel worthwhile.
I think it's safe to say that Tim gets very few pats on the back. Not because people don't know he is working hard, but because it is an expectation we all have for him. So even when he goes above and beyond.. its just normal tim. Recently though, he was really recognized. Greenville named him Citizen of the Year. What an honor. Never a day in my life have I been more proud. And it wasn't because he is my husband.. it was because he really deserved it. He really gets up everyday and makes peoples lives better, mine included. He is a quiet strength that I know many people respect, but I am thankful that he now has a plaque on his wall to remind him.. that even if it is not said everyday.. he is valued and appreciated.
He is my Citizen of the Year every year! But I am glad he is Greenville's this year as well :)
I think it's safe to say that Tim gets very few pats on the back. Not because people don't know he is working hard, but because it is an expectation we all have for him. So even when he goes above and beyond.. its just normal tim. Recently though, he was really recognized. Greenville named him Citizen of the Year. What an honor. Never a day in my life have I been more proud. And it wasn't because he is my husband.. it was because he really deserved it. He really gets up everyday and makes peoples lives better, mine included. He is a quiet strength that I know many people respect, but I am thankful that he now has a plaque on his wall to remind him.. that even if it is not said everyday.. he is valued and appreciated.
He is my Citizen of the Year every year! But I am glad he is Greenville's this year as well :)
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Your love is way too much to give us lesser things..
Tiffany turned 18 Friday. We went to Bonefish to celebrate and we had a really nice time. All she wanted was money to help fix a few things on her car, so her gifts werent super exciting. But she does have her car a visit to the mechanic scheduled so she is happy. She is going to register to vote this week, and she is doing really well. She was on the honor roll again this 9 weeks. We are very proud all the way around.
Cates is beautiful and happy. She and I are both thankful she is able to stay with Lauren four days a week and Aunt Tina one day. Cates mama was just not ready to send her to daycare (although I am a believer in daycare and know it promotes social and educational skills). She will go soon enough.. just a few more weeks in someone's home is giving me peace. Praise God for good friends. I am thankful for my quality of friends, and recognize that is much more important than quanity. Pray for Cates reflux to ease. It causes her such pain, and I will be glad when she grows out of it.
Andrew's adoption celebration was so special. We were joined by 75 friends and family members to share the joy of his new last name. We appreciate so much everyone who came. Tim's refereeing friends and family came, my school's PTO President, several sweet DHR ladies, Andrew's daycare teachers, and church and community friends. We had a sweet slideshow and everyone who attended wrote him a note about what he has meant in their lives. Love like we have for Andrew is precious and rare. With great pride I celebrate him as my little boy.
Tim is continuing to work so hard for our family. We are all so thankful for him. Thankful for his work ethic and the love he has for us that drives him to be such a wonderful provider.
I am back busy at school. I loved my time home with Cates, and look forward to our summer together. But I am glad to be back with my school children too.
We are blessed and very aware that all gifts come from above. I love the verse of the song that says.. " Your love is way too great to give us lesser things." Because His desire for us far exceed any we could have for ourselves and the ones we love.
Cates is beautiful and happy. She and I are both thankful she is able to stay with Lauren four days a week and Aunt Tina one day. Cates mama was just not ready to send her to daycare (although I am a believer in daycare and know it promotes social and educational skills). She will go soon enough.. just a few more weeks in someone's home is giving me peace. Praise God for good friends. I am thankful for my quality of friends, and recognize that is much more important than quanity. Pray for Cates reflux to ease. It causes her such pain, and I will be glad when she grows out of it.
Andrew's adoption celebration was so special. We were joined by 75 friends and family members to share the joy of his new last name. We appreciate so much everyone who came. Tim's refereeing friends and family came, my school's PTO President, several sweet DHR ladies, Andrew's daycare teachers, and church and community friends. We had a sweet slideshow and everyone who attended wrote him a note about what he has meant in their lives. Love like we have for Andrew is precious and rare. With great pride I celebrate him as my little boy.
Tim is continuing to work so hard for our family. We are all so thankful for him. Thankful for his work ethic and the love he has for us that drives him to be such a wonderful provider.
I am back busy at school. I loved my time home with Cates, and look forward to our summer together. But I am glad to be back with my school children too.
We are blessed and very aware that all gifts come from above. I love the verse of the song that says.. " Your love is way too great to give us lesser things." Because His desire for us far exceed any we could have for ourselves and the ones we love.
Sunday, January 8, 2012
beautiful tiffany.
This was written by our sweet almost 18 year old foster child. Her words are beautiful and so telling of the heart of a teenager in foster care. This is an essay she wrote for a scholarship.
The first day I heard the word hope was my dad using it saying "I hope y'all don't get taken away". As a little girl I struggled to understand why there are things like abuse, hunger, lack of love, and lack of supervision.
I have faced many obstacles which have given me the dream of becoming a social worker for DHR. I understand what it feels like to come from nothing and be thought of as a nothing.
No one in my family has finished college. I want to break the chains of my family. I want them to see me as someone who didn't let their life story end. I want to motivate them, and others in the world.
There are so many children in foster care. Many of them need someone to say "hey, I have been there". I want to be that someone. The someone who does everything in their power to provide needs, happiness, comfort, accomplishment of goals, and safety in their lives.
The reason I am an applicant for this scholarship is because I can't do it alone. I believe this scholarship will help me achieve my dream.
I hope, pray, and dream of being someone who helps others. I have realized being in the system has made an impact on my life and I believe there is a reason I became a foster child. It is my dream to work with children and parents for everyones best interest. Please help my dreams come true.
The first day I heard the word hope was my dad using it saying "I hope y'all don't get taken away". As a little girl I struggled to understand why there are things like abuse, hunger, lack of love, and lack of supervision.
I have faced many obstacles which have given me the dream of becoming a social worker for DHR. I understand what it feels like to come from nothing and be thought of as a nothing.
No one in my family has finished college. I want to break the chains of my family. I want them to see me as someone who didn't let their life story end. I want to motivate them, and others in the world.
There are so many children in foster care. Many of them need someone to say "hey, I have been there". I want to be that someone. The someone who does everything in their power to provide needs, happiness, comfort, accomplishment of goals, and safety in their lives.
The reason I am an applicant for this scholarship is because I can't do it alone. I believe this scholarship will help me achieve my dream.
I hope, pray, and dream of being someone who helps others. I have realized being in the system has made an impact on my life and I believe there is a reason I became a foster child. It is my dream to work with children and parents for everyones best interest. Please help my dreams come true.
Friday, January 6, 2012
Andrew's Mama
Andrew Croley. My heart. When I laid him in his bed last night I couldn't help but have a few tears. Probably because I am a cryer, but it was the first time I had ever laid him down as mine. Not DHR's, not someone else's child I was caring for, my very own little boy. What relief. What a testament to the power of prayer. What an example of God truly having a plan. Not a "here let Me give you your way right this second" kind of plan.. but a plan for the faithful to journey through with a beautful ending (and well beginning).
One prayer I had all along was to make our family strong in order to deal with any negative opinions about us being different races. My how that prayer was answered. Not only have we only recieved love and support from our family and friends we have met or heard about so many others who are in the process of or who have recently adopted children of different ethnicities. Grandmama and I were talking yesterday about how common it is becoming. I praise God for increased tolerance and love. I love when people ask about Andrew, because I love telling the beautiful story of God's plan for his life.
I always think about the first day I went to court for Andrew when he was just three days old. And a lawyer there asking me how we were doing.. I said we are wonderful.. he is precious. He looked at me kind of mean and said.. well lets all just be honest he has a long road ahead. And I remember my stubborn self thinking.. he doesnt have to.. he isnt sentenced to sad life at 3 days old. And I think God heard me. And I think my stubborness and our families love and DHR's desire to work the very best out lead us to where we are today.. I am Andrew's mom. And I praise God.
One prayer I had all along was to make our family strong in order to deal with any negative opinions about us being different races. My how that prayer was answered. Not only have we only recieved love and support from our family and friends we have met or heard about so many others who are in the process of or who have recently adopted children of different ethnicities. Grandmama and I were talking yesterday about how common it is becoming. I praise God for increased tolerance and love. I love when people ask about Andrew, because I love telling the beautiful story of God's plan for his life.
I always think about the first day I went to court for Andrew when he was just three days old. And a lawyer there asking me how we were doing.. I said we are wonderful.. he is precious. He looked at me kind of mean and said.. well lets all just be honest he has a long road ahead. And I remember my stubborn self thinking.. he doesnt have to.. he isnt sentenced to sad life at 3 days old. And I think God heard me. And I think my stubborness and our families love and DHR's desire to work the very best out lead us to where we are today.. I am Andrew's mom. And I praise God.
