..rambling

For a long time, I admittedly was a negative finder. Probably due to my own insecurities, I could find the negative in people.. in situations.. in areas of my life that I didn't feel totally confident about... or maybe felt jealous of. Now I am not saying I was "Debbie Downer" many of these negative findings I didn't share with anyone or if I did share.. it was only with close friends and family. But now.. I look back and feel sorry for myself. Feel sorry that I was so negative, that I didn't give people and things and situations a chance to be beneficial, I just turned my nose up and wrote things off.

I can tell you this deep dark secret now, because I am somewhat reformed. Now, I do still fuss. I do still get my feathers ruffled. But I find myself taking many more opportunities to see the good. I find myself looking past my own shortcomings to take joy in the success of others. And I, my friends, think this is called maturity. I think that unselfishly wanting good for others is not a quality we are born with. I think that it takes a conscious effort on our parts.. to stop.. look past ourselves, and look out for others.


Moving along.. :) Tonight is Chris and Jacob's last basketball game. I hope Jacob is able to go. Tim and my dad did a wonderful job coaching them. I think daily about how blessed I am to have two such amazingly selfless men around :)

My heart continues to heal as we adjust to life without Gracie Mae and Jacob. Aunt Tina has offered so many comforting words.. the day they left.. she told me that it was not the end.. and I think about that all the time and find such peace. She also reminded me of how God is taking care of them, and how he loves them even more than I do. And I know He will take care of them. God has a plan for us and them, and I feel like our paths will cross again. :)

This weekend is Mardi Gras! I am so excited! My family, mama and daddy, Bert and a friend! We just really hang out, eat, catch beads, I look forward to it so much every year!

I hope Valentine's Day won't be a total wash since it is on a Sunday.. guess we will see :)