Have you ever just really thought about someone else.. just really let who they are sink in.. and been totally amazed. Alot of times in the day to day, I see Tim. I see him as who I need to take out the trash, I see him as who I need to coordinate schedules with, I see him as my partner in paying bills and getting by. But sometimes it just hits me who he really is..
He is a selfless, hard working, focused, honest, good man. He works hard every day for our family.
Yes, he goes to a 7-4 job that is often times 7-7 or called in the middle of the night.. but that isnt even where his work begins. He works with the youth at our church. He is honestly committed to the belief that they have the brightest futures if they invest totally in God. He spends much time preparing lessons and planning events. But I would say.. that is not even where his work begins. I see his hard work in helping two little girls get dressed every morning. I see his hard work in rocking a baby to sleep at night. I see his hard work in parenting a teenager to the best of his ability. I see his hard work in making time to make me regularly feel valued. He takes out trash, and washes clothes, and feeds dogs, and is often times everything to everyone. And very seldom do I see people really stop to see how they can lighten his load.. and I dont think he even notices.
He is selfless. Alot of people have told me they would be foster parents if their partners would agree. And I totally get that. Men think differently than we do. Men view things differently than we do. And alot of times their hestitation is needed. And if they have reservations about taking on the role, that should be taken seriously. It has to be something both people are totally sold out to. I totally believe that. With all that said, Tim didn't hesitate. He didn't look for ways out. He saw a need. He wanted to be a cure to the problem. Tim and I decided early on we didn't want to be people who dwelled on problems, we wanted to fix them. And I love that early in our marriage before we were set in our ways, we decided to make a difference. And sometimes lost under the stacks of clothes and piles of homework I wonder about what life with just us would be like. And selfishly I guess sometimes I dream of every night as a date night and every morning as one where we could sleep late.. but then it hits me.. I would not want to be doing anything other than what we are doing right now. And there is no one I could hope to be more of a partner than Tim.
He isn't perfect. Sometimes hes a bed hog. Sometimes I feel like the ballgame will never end! Sometimes I think he is being a little poutish. Sometimes I want him to freak out over something that he totally remains calm about. Sometimes we fuss. Sometimes we have different parenting styles. But he is honestly, the best person I know. He has the most sincere desire to do good, and to be good. And he inspires that in me.
So today on Tim's birthday.. I see him. I see him for the amazing man that he is. And I am thankful.
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Just Trust.
I have a confession. I let worry rule my life. I let it keep me from sleeping sometimes. I let it keep me from enjoying precious moments at times. I let it keep me from trusting God the way I am supposed to. People say worry does no good. They are absolutely right. I cannot tell you one problem I have had solved by my worrying. Now, I can tell you about time wasted, I can tell you about energy not spent in a productive way. But for some reason.. worry is hard to lose. I talk to myself constantly about trusting. Tim reminds me of scriptures. And still I let it control me. Pray that I can let go and let God!! I mean how beautiful would it be to live with total trust in God and total peace knowing He is in control. What a relief it would be to realize that I do not have to worry about things, try to control everything, feel totally responsible for everything, because there is someone who loves me more than any earthly person who is working things out for me.
I have so much to work on. I want to start with worry. I want to start with ridding my life of it. I want to start by finding that peace that is promised through trust. I would appreciate your prayers that I do overcome my worry problem. And prayers that God will just work out all of my concerns, and prayers that I will let go.. and let God.
Tim and I are having lots of company this weekend! We are going to keep two little girls for another foster mom. Respite it is officially called. They are our little girls age so it should be like one big slumber party! Chris also called Tim earlier in the week and asked if he could come for the weekend. Of course, we said yes! Altogether that is seven children (unless mom and dad take Andrew like they love to do! ). I am sure it will be a lot of fun.. and fly by!
Love to all.
I have so much to work on. I want to start with worry. I want to start with ridding my life of it. I want to start by finding that peace that is promised through trust. I would appreciate your prayers that I do overcome my worry problem. And prayers that God will just work out all of my concerns, and prayers that I will let go.. and let God.
Tim and I are having lots of company this weekend! We are going to keep two little girls for another foster mom. Respite it is officially called. They are our little girls age so it should be like one big slumber party! Chris also called Tim earlier in the week and asked if he could come for the weekend. Of course, we said yes! Altogether that is seven children (unless mom and dad take Andrew like they love to do! ). I am sure it will be a lot of fun.. and fly by!
Love to all.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Tyrese. Let me tell you about him. My first day as a real life teacher with a classroom of my own was january 2008. That was also tyrese's first day at our school. He was put on my role, and I loved him instantly. He was six years old and had already had a difficult life. He touched my heart and I wanted to cure his world. I couldn't totally. But I could make his week days from 7am until 3pm pleasant. And safe. So I tried my best. The next school year after having to move again this time in with an elderly grandmother figure I decided we needed to do more. We started getting him and his younger brother on saturdays and taking them to restaurants and movies. They were some of the first people to see our new house even before we bought it. Tim taught tyrese to do flips off the diving board. Santa visits them at our house.. for 3 yrs now. They are my school children. Their teachers call me with praise or need for correction. We truly love them. And I ask you to pray for them. Pray that they grow up to know Jesus. Pray that they choose right over wrong and that they grow up to be respectful men. Pray for tyrese and david :)
Several people have told me lately they are reading my blog. I am thankful. I don't know if I have ever point blank asked you to consider being foster parents, but please do. There is a need that I cannot even explain. It won't be easy. You will have very little privacy. You will love children who will leave. You will love children who are hard to love. You will be talked about and occasionally you will be really discouraged. Your heart will be broken. But I think pretty quickly you will discover its not about you at all. Your fear of being left brokenhearted will be outweighed by your desire to change a life. Your love for difficult children will flow easily. You won't care what people say, and you will soak up every kind word that comes your way. I struggle with being selfish, and I am continually thankful for the opportunity to live a more selfless life through fostering. I want to stress again the need for you. The real need. If I can answer any questions or help you in anyway.. email me at lcroley@yahoo.com or find me on facebook! Love to all :) and as always your prayers for our babies are coveted.
Several people have told me lately they are reading my blog. I am thankful. I don't know if I have ever point blank asked you to consider being foster parents, but please do. There is a need that I cannot even explain. It won't be easy. You will have very little privacy. You will love children who will leave. You will love children who are hard to love. You will be talked about and occasionally you will be really discouraged. Your heart will be broken. But I think pretty quickly you will discover its not about you at all. Your fear of being left brokenhearted will be outweighed by your desire to change a life. Your love for difficult children will flow easily. You won't care what people say, and you will soak up every kind word that comes your way. I struggle with being selfish, and I am continually thankful for the opportunity to live a more selfless life through fostering. I want to stress again the need for you. The real need. If I can answer any questions or help you in anyway.. email me at lcroley@yahoo.com or find me on facebook! Love to all :) and as always your prayers for our babies are coveted.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
What's Different?
Since becoming a “middle mom” as I like to say to avoid always using the sometimes negatively viewed “foster” term.. A lot about me has changed. I thought I would share with you what becoming someone else’s child’s parental figure makes you feel.. maybe becoming a becoming a biological mom has the same effect.. I wouldn’t know yet :)
I really don’t care what you think about me.
Now, that is true to an extent. There was a time that I would do what I thought others wanted from me regardless of how it made me feel. I would put my feelings very last in an effort to be “approved of” by others. That time has passed. I find myself doing more and more things (or less and less things) to preserve my sanity. Because if you don’t live in my house, or you aren’t my immediate family.. your needs have to come second. I want to be happy. I want my children to be happy. I want Tim and my parents and grandparents to be happy. If I have to sacrifice to make that happen, then I gladly will. But I can no longer try to keep EVERYONE happy with me. It isn’ t rational to believe everyone will like you, accept you, approve of you, it isn’t happening.
Knee scrapes, hurt feelings, and understanding that you really deep down matter are a much bigger deal.
I am super sensitive. But I will admit that when watching mothers when their children—to an extent I have thought a lot of them were a little dramatic. I mean is the fact that your child tripped really a big deal? Is it that terrible that they didn’t get the color sucker they wanted? Do you really have to tell them how special they are every five minutes? And I know now.. the answer is yes. That knee might not hurt that much.. but pride is hurt.. and a little fear about falling again is involved. The sucker color isn’t major, but the fact that they haven’t napped or eaten on time in two days plays a part—so at this point—yes, we need a red sucker. And I catch myself making sure my children know that I love them constantly. It’s not that I think they will forget if I don’t tell them constantly—but I think there is a lot to say for really knowing that someone loves you without exceptions all the time.
It’s okay. Stare.
To see the way people look at us sometimes is priceless. I have come to love it. They stare. I smile. They give a rude look. I smile. They whisper. I smile. If you haven’t seen our current family. We don’t all look the same. Some of us are a beautiful brown color, some of us have been hitting the tanning bed, and the rest of us are plain ole white. Sometimes when people talk about us my mom or grandmom want us to go to them and explain. I just don’t. I don’t think that it matters, and I think that the whole world could stand being a little more tolerant. If I get to help teach that lesson, I am happy to do it. Let’s be real. God made everybody. God loves everybody. I believe that heaven will be as colorful as a rainbow. So its okay, stare.
More to come :)
I really don’t care what you think about me.
Now, that is true to an extent. There was a time that I would do what I thought others wanted from me regardless of how it made me feel. I would put my feelings very last in an effort to be “approved of” by others. That time has passed. I find myself doing more and more things (or less and less things) to preserve my sanity. Because if you don’t live in my house, or you aren’t my immediate family.. your needs have to come second. I want to be happy. I want my children to be happy. I want Tim and my parents and grandparents to be happy. If I have to sacrifice to make that happen, then I gladly will. But I can no longer try to keep EVERYONE happy with me. It isn’ t rational to believe everyone will like you, accept you, approve of you, it isn’t happening.
Knee scrapes, hurt feelings, and understanding that you really deep down matter are a much bigger deal.
I am super sensitive. But I will admit that when watching mothers when their children—to an extent I have thought a lot of them were a little dramatic. I mean is the fact that your child tripped really a big deal? Is it that terrible that they didn’t get the color sucker they wanted? Do you really have to tell them how special they are every five minutes? And I know now.. the answer is yes. That knee might not hurt that much.. but pride is hurt.. and a little fear about falling again is involved. The sucker color isn’t major, but the fact that they haven’t napped or eaten on time in two days plays a part—so at this point—yes, we need a red sucker. And I catch myself making sure my children know that I love them constantly. It’s not that I think they will forget if I don’t tell them constantly—but I think there is a lot to say for really knowing that someone loves you without exceptions all the time.
It’s okay. Stare.
To see the way people look at us sometimes is priceless. I have come to love it. They stare. I smile. They give a rude look. I smile. They whisper. I smile. If you haven’t seen our current family. We don’t all look the same. Some of us are a beautiful brown color, some of us have been hitting the tanning bed, and the rest of us are plain ole white. Sometimes when people talk about us my mom or grandmom want us to go to them and explain. I just don’t. I don’t think that it matters, and I think that the whole world could stand being a little more tolerant. If I get to help teach that lesson, I am happy to do it. Let’s be real. God made everybody. God loves everybody. I believe that heaven will be as colorful as a rainbow. So its okay, stare.
More to come :)
Thursday, February 10, 2011
".. I hear voices all the time."
I love that song. Voices. "Daddy says work that job, but don't work your life away.. Mama telling me to drop some cash in the offering plate on Sunday.."
I am tired. I am frazzled. And I am incredibly happy. Andrew has been sick with RSV for several days now. It has provided us several sleepless nights (one night off – thanks to my daddy pulling overnight sick baby duty!!) But he appears to be on the mend. I could not be more thankful for Aunt Tina keeping him. NO WHERE ELSE could he been more loved or taken care of. What a blessing in our lives. If you haven’t lately, please pray for baby Andrew’s future.. I find the uncertainty weighing extra hard on us lately..
Tiffany was baptized Sunday night. After about a three hour discussion with us Sunday afternoon, she made the decision to give her life to Christ. Tim baptized her, and that was so special to me. He is not her daddy, but he has such confidence in her future.. and such dedication to helping her reach her potential. I believe she fully understands her responsibility to live like Jesus did. Pray for her to be fruitful.
J and M continue to brighten our days! We have seen so much progress with M and raving reviews from so many people who have been working with her for months. J is happy and sings and laughs and loves church!
Tim has been taking me on weekly dates, and it is needed and enjoyed! We are skipping this Friday for Dad’s big birthday bash! But..we are making it up Monday for Valentines Day!
Tim has been preaching some at church to fill in while we look for a new preacher. I love hearing him. He preaches a lot of times just what I need to hear.. about not being selfish.. and not getting hung up on what I have messed up.. but getting up and doing better! His lessons have been current and made me think.. I am thankful everyday that he is my husband.
We are both also doing Scaleback Alabama! It is a statewide 10 week program encouraging people to lose ten pounds.. so far.. its been.. an experience ;)
More soon :)
I am tired. I am frazzled. And I am incredibly happy. Andrew has been sick with RSV for several days now. It has provided us several sleepless nights (one night off – thanks to my daddy pulling overnight sick baby duty!!) But he appears to be on the mend. I could not be more thankful for Aunt Tina keeping him. NO WHERE ELSE could he been more loved or taken care of. What a blessing in our lives. If you haven’t lately, please pray for baby Andrew’s future.. I find the uncertainty weighing extra hard on us lately..
Tiffany was baptized Sunday night. After about a three hour discussion with us Sunday afternoon, she made the decision to give her life to Christ. Tim baptized her, and that was so special to me. He is not her daddy, but he has such confidence in her future.. and such dedication to helping her reach her potential. I believe she fully understands her responsibility to live like Jesus did. Pray for her to be fruitful.
J and M continue to brighten our days! We have seen so much progress with M and raving reviews from so many people who have been working with her for months. J is happy and sings and laughs and loves church!
Tim has been taking me on weekly dates, and it is needed and enjoyed! We are skipping this Friday for Dad’s big birthday bash! But..we are making it up Monday for Valentines Day!
Tim has been preaching some at church to fill in while we look for a new preacher. I love hearing him. He preaches a lot of times just what I need to hear.. about not being selfish.. and not getting hung up on what I have messed up.. but getting up and doing better! His lessons have been current and made me think.. I am thankful everyday that he is my husband.
We are both also doing Scaleback Alabama! It is a statewide 10 week program encouraging people to lose ten pounds.. so far.. its been.. an experience ;)
More soon :)
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
The Bigger Picture.
Have you ever thought about that since you were a child God knew who you would be today. It occurred to me not long ago, that when I was a little girl God knew that I would be a wife, teacher, and foster mother. I think back to the ways He prepared me to be exactly who I am today. It is astonishing to me. He is preparing me now for who I will be in years to come. Amazing. It is such a comfort to me to know that on my most hectic days, God knows what’s next.
I have debated about what to say about our recent fostering events. I never want to say too much, but at the same time, I cannot pretend nothing is happening. I have decided to only say that we had a teenage boy live with us for about three months. We loved him, and in our desire for the very best for him we found that we were not it. We will continue to love him and pray for him. I am glad that God brought him into our lives, and I hope that wherever he goes next will prove to be exactly what he needs.
J and M continue to adjust to our home. I will say that other than maybe Grace, it has been the smoothest transition yet. I have never known children with as much need to be really, totally loved as these two precious girls. We see such improvements daily. I am so excited that God is providing us the opportunity to be hands and feet to these sweet babies.
We celebrated Tiffany’s 17th birthday last week. We went to Olive Garden (her choice) on Thursday and had our family over on Sunday for lunch. I think she truly sees how blessed she is. I continue to pray for her desire to be baptized. You pray for her too please
Andrew was 17 lbs at his six month appt! Can you believe when we brought him home from the hospital he was less than 6lbs? Crazy! Everyone who sees him tells me how “juicy” he is.. haha! When it comes to Andrew I am putting total faith in Mark 11:24.
Chris lived with us for about ten months and then went home to his mom. He called us last night and will be coming to spend the night this weekend. I cannot wait to see him and hear how he is doing! I am thankful his mom is so open to us continuing a relationship with him.
Tim and I have started "date nights" which are much needed. It is the plan that each Friday night we will go and have dinner and really just be married for awhile :) I am hoping that it works out each week!
Your prayers are coveted.
--Linds :)
I have debated about what to say about our recent fostering events. I never want to say too much, but at the same time, I cannot pretend nothing is happening. I have decided to only say that we had a teenage boy live with us for about three months. We loved him, and in our desire for the very best for him we found that we were not it. We will continue to love him and pray for him. I am glad that God brought him into our lives, and I hope that wherever he goes next will prove to be exactly what he needs.
J and M continue to adjust to our home. I will say that other than maybe Grace, it has been the smoothest transition yet. I have never known children with as much need to be really, totally loved as these two precious girls. We see such improvements daily. I am so excited that God is providing us the opportunity to be hands and feet to these sweet babies.
We celebrated Tiffany’s 17th birthday last week. We went to Olive Garden (her choice) on Thursday and had our family over on Sunday for lunch. I think she truly sees how blessed she is. I continue to pray for her desire to be baptized. You pray for her too please
Andrew was 17 lbs at his six month appt! Can you believe when we brought him home from the hospital he was less than 6lbs? Crazy! Everyone who sees him tells me how “juicy” he is.. haha! When it comes to Andrew I am putting total faith in Mark 11:24.
Chris lived with us for about ten months and then went home to his mom. He called us last night and will be coming to spend the night this weekend. I cannot wait to see him and hear how he is doing! I am thankful his mom is so open to us continuing a relationship with him.
Tim and I have started "date nights" which are much needed. It is the plan that each Friday night we will go and have dinner and really just be married for awhile :) I am hoping that it works out each week!
Your prayers are coveted.
--Linds :)
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
...a full house is a happy house :)
I am proud to announce the arrival of two precious little girls into our home :) J is a sweet 6 year old. She sings non stop and I am excited to say knows all of her letters and sounds.. and can read several words. She is one of the most pleasant people I have ever been around. M is 2. She smiles constantly. When I wake her up in the mornings she hugs and kisses me like seeing me is an event. Thinking about her makes me smile. She also is capable of a fit, and last night she and Andrew decided to have one at the same time. It was slightly overwhelming, but I am sure it will not be the last time that duo gives me a run for my money :) My heart is just really full. I know it's alot of responsibility, but I don't mind it. I like to think the reward always out weighs the work. I am also capable because of my great support system. Mama and daddy love all of the children so much, and Aunt Tina is a constant. Grandparents love them too :) Trina and Mr. Tim are always so welcoming as well! I am thankful daily for the people who love me, Tim, and our babies (and teenagers!!).
School is fantastic and my children are brilliant! I am just really happy.
School is fantastic and my children are brilliant! I am just really happy.
